21 Things Your Mom Was Absolutely Right About

21 Things Your Mom Was Absolutely Right About

Mother knows best, right?
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All those things she said to you when you were a kid and they sounded cheesy? They're true, and they mean the world to you now whether you realize it or not. She's there for you, she loves you and so much more.

1. Those dishes won't do themselves

And they will stack up fast.

2. Money doesn't grow on trees

But, god, you wish it did.

3. Home is where the heart is

Whether it's your new school or your hometown, home will shift and mutate throughout your life but it's always full of people who mean the world to you.

4. Put on sunscreen

You think you don't need to but if you don't use it? You're definitely getting sun burnt.

5. You should learn to do your own laundry

Because when you end up calling her from your dorm room at college asking whether that one shirt should go with the light or the dark clothes she'll answer but she'll roll her eyes a little.

6. Take pictures of everything

A picture is worth a thousand words.

7. Setting aside time for yourself is healthy

And encouraged. Plus, sometimes you just need to tell your friends no and sit at home alone.

8. You have to spray the pan before you make cookies

Because the last thing you want is the cookies burnt onto the pan. Don't ruin your kitchenware.

9. Unless it's a nonstick pan

Then you're probably in the clear.

10. Too much cookie dough will make you sick

But you're going to keep eating too much anyways.

11. Thank you notes are necessary

"A child who can write a nice thank-you note can turn into a cocaine dealer five years later and be remembered as the child who wrote nice thank-you notes." -Lemony Snicket

12. Don't be the kid who does cocaine

Or the kid who deals cocaine. She will not stand for that behavior.

13. Spending time with your grandparents is important

Because grandparents are the best.

14. She does everything in this house

No matter how much you think you're doing, she's honestly doing twice as much.

15. Boys will be boys

You won't like it, and you'll expect better from a lot of boys, but until they're ready to grow up boys will definitely be boys.

16. Breakfast for dinner is always good

And ordering in has to happen regularly. Maybe not regularly, but occasionally.

17. Driver has veto power on the radio

It kind of sucked when she changed Hannah Montana, but now you can use the rule on your friends to change the station back to Hannah Montana.

18. Always wear your seat belt

Always! Always! Always!

19. Tell people you love them when you do

It's important and so are they. No one is too cool or too tough for you to tell them you love them.

20. Kids love Disney movies

This one has helped you through countless nights of babysitting. Also, you might love Disney movies even more now.

21. Everything happens for a reason

Everything will work itself out. She loves you and she's there.

Cover Image Credit: Haley Holden

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4 Reasons Why Dads Threatening Their Daughters' Boyfriends Aren't Funny

No guns, threats, or creepy infringement on their privacy necessary.
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This week, former NFL player Jay Feely caught Twitter's attention by posting a picture with his daughter and her prom date and a handgun.

While the comedic undertones of the photo are obvious, Twitter had a lot to say about the picture and most people weren't happy.

He has since issued a statement of clarification after the tweet went viral, acknowledging that gun safety is an important issue and clarifying that he was in fact joking. Unfortunately, though, the damage had already been done.

Feely is far from the only dad who's ever made this joke. It's a largely prevalent theme specifically among gun owners and in country music. Check out the song "Cleaning This Gun" for another example. It's catchy, I have to admit, I just listened to it again voluntarily the other day even though I don't agree with the central message.

But what's really the matter with this picture? After all, it's just dads being dads, right? Wrong. The political, historical, and gender-specific rhetoric behind the idea of dads protecting their daughters by threatening their boyfriends have all combined to create a lot of things wrong with this picture. Here are 4 of them.

1. Gun violence is no laughing matter

This theme has come up over and over and over again this year but it's one that continues to be relevant and timely. Gun violence is a very real issue, with thousands of deaths, dozens of mass shootings, and deep political biases, making it far from a joke. While there is a major difference between the handgun in Feely's picture and the assault weapons that have been at the center of recent mass shootings, threatening to shoot someone, particularly an unarmed teenager, is just poor humor.

2. Parents do not get a say in their daughters' sexual choices

From chastity rallies at churches to purity balls entrusting their sexual purity to their dads to presenting "virginity certificates" to dads at weddings (hint, you can't medically prove someone's a virgin), parents' obsession with their daughters' sexual behaviors, not their sons', mind you, just their daughters, is creepy, intrusive, and disgusting.

Decisions about whether or not to engage in sexual activity, at any point from high school to marriage and on to the rest of their lives, is up to the two people involved, not the parents, the church, the government, or any outside parties. By reinforcing the idea that the parent is in control of these decisions that their kids are supposed to make for themselves, parents like these are perpetuating archaic ideals, destroying the trust their children have in them, and setting them up for destructive sexual behavior down the line.

3. There is an extremely obvious (and dangerous) sexual double standard between boys and girls

While young women are told to guard their purity and that engaging in sexual activity makes them less worthwhile people, boys are encouraged to use sexual conquests to assert their dominance and their behaviors are not focused on nearly as much by parents, religious organizations, or sexual education programs.

If women are taught to remain virginal until marriage and homosexuality is frowned down upon, who exactly are these boys supposed to be having sexual conquests with? Beats me.

4. Sexual repression and rape culture go hand-in-hand

These parents criticize their daughters for participating in safe, monogamous sexual relationships but do not give the same attention and threats to people that threaten their wellbeing. By teaching your daughter that she can't trust you, you're setting her up for trouble down the line.

While this entire situation could be passed off as a harmless joke that got a little out of hand, it's obvious that the problems run deep and can have a lasting effect, especially on the girl at the center of the "joke." Bottom line, trust your kids. Believe that they have the self-respect and the critical thinking skills to make healthy relationship decisions and support them in making them. No guns, threats, or creepy infringement on their privacy necessary.

Cover Image Credit: Jay Feely: Twitter

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I Am My Anxious Mother's Daughter

And on my bad days, I want her to remember this.
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I am the daughter of a mother with an anxious mind. We live by our lists and choke on our worries, but damn do we have it together. With so many loose ends pin-balling through our thoughts, sometimes we’re prone to forgetfulness. You’ve seen us before—our hair is often frizzy, our eyes tired. But our minds—they’re running wild. It’s dizzying. They never stop.

As soon as I walk down the stairs, as soon as she gets that good morning text, I know she can see it. Maybe it’s intuition, maybe it’s connection, maybe it’s just plain and simple: a mother’s love, but whatever it is, I know that she sees it. And I know that she worries.

But she shouldn’t. She prepared me for this. With her as my mother, I have an armory of determination, adamancy, and purpose. When my head spins the way it does, it is hard to not demean myself for the twisted way I go about things with such rigidity, such worry, but I know that I am valued for my order, my neatness, my prudence.

It’s exhausting, but we’re stubborn. It’s unlike us to turn down a challenge. We’ve learned to stop fearing the whirlwind that is our every day. It’s a part of us as much as the fine lines beneath the creases on our cheeks. We have worry lines, yes, but we have smile lines too. We’ve been figuring this out together. It’s a one day at a time kind of process. The irony of bonding through worry is not lost on me though.

But my mother, anxious mind, oversized purse, and all, is a through and through badass, and she’s turning me into one too. She is the strongest and strongest-willed person I know. She takes everything head-on with unmatched confidence. She has everything in order to a tee (even though she rarely think she does), and her loved ones rely on her for a sense of order and harmony in their own lives.

And I see that order (which I’ll admit borders on too rigid sometimes) seeping into my own habits.

Asking my roommate at 10 in the morning what we should make for dinner that night.

Sitting up in my bed, still half-asleep in the middle of the night, suddenly jotting down lists of chores to be done.

Planning my trips and even just my average days in what I think to be the “most logical” order—which yes, is entirely arbitrary.

And I can catch clearer glimpses of her in myself every day—on my crumpled up sticky note to-do list, reminding me of the articles I have to read (and write), the papers I have to edit.

I see her in my knack for planning even the most mundane events step by step, so as to not miss a detail.

I don’t let life happen to me. She taught me how to do that. She taught me that nothing is really out of my own control. She taught me that my strength is in my independence, and as long as I can keep myself and my loved ones in line, there is little that can best me.

They say as we women get older, we start to become our mother, and I can only hope that’s true.

Cover Image Credit: Pexels

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