This whole "Bro," culture to me is a complete joke. Masculinity should not be justified by how many women you sleep with, or how many beers you can chug. Trans men are men. Gay men are men. Cis-gendered men are men. There is no such thing as you being defined as a dude by your facial hair or lack of, or how much you can bench. Men should be allowed to cry, show emotion; participate in arts and literature. Toxic masculinity is a problem, men demoralizing other men because of their lack of "manly," interests is not right. There is no such thing as a "real," man. Real men are whoever they want to be, there is no manliness test you take in school, where you take a class to learn to change a tire and how to fish. Simply put, the concept of being a "man," and sticking to gender roles is a joke.

I've always been the little fat kid who was the biggest nerd. Struggling with so much guilt and hostility over not being a man's man. Why does it matter what I have in between my legs, or what I like to do, in order to determine me being a man? What matters more, me being a generally good person or cheating on my significant other at some party and having my friends cover for me because of the "bro code."

To be honest, I'm softer than what the standard man protocol would dictate. Feelings are important to me, my health matters to me, and I just don't rub dirt in my wounds to toughen up. There is nothing weak about showing emotion, showing you care. Beating the hell out of someone who insulted me or hit on my girlfriend solves literally nothing and only creates more problems. Even the term "man up," is gross. There's an implication on men only being allowed to be strong, like women aren't allowed to be as strong or brave. Frankly, it's just wrong. Be a guy, be whatever man you want, but don't use your position to put down other people for not fitting into the stereotype that you choose to live in.