Your birthday was this past week. You turned 15, which I am still processing. Half of the time I can barely comprehend that this little kid, this baby that my mom brought home, is not a baby nor a kid anymore. The other half of the time I am in awe of this person you have become and are still becoming.
You started high school this year, and of course, you already have a 4.0 average. You followed your passion and went out for the cross-country team, and of course, you were just seconds away from beating the record time. Everything is effortless for you, I'm jealous sometimes. Don't take that the wrong way because I am so, SO proud of you. But, you know, I AM the oldest. I want to be the best, is it petty? Yes. But, hold on, it's not as petty as you think. I want to be the best for you.
Being the oldest is no easy job. Since the day you were born you've watched me, copied me, and learned from me (both good and bad traits). When you were little, as you know, we were not the best of friends. You were a gross little boy, and I was a preteen girl, so I think we can both admit we were not at our best. But, despite as annoying and disgusting as I may have found you, you were always my motivation. From day one, at seven years old, I knew that I always had to be the best I could be, for you. At times I slipped up, we know this. But, you never cared. You never once made me feel like I was a bad sister, let alone a bad person.
As we both got older and we became close, my eyes were opened to what a cool little dude you were, and still are (minus the "little" part). I was shocked and amazed by the knowledge you had, the random facts you possessed. We started to actually "hang out" and do things together, and I was reminded that we do have quite a few things in common. You became my best friend. You ARE my best friend. And the pressure to be the best became even higher. Now I knew you looked up to me, you asked me for fashion advice and told me more and more things about your life. I saw how much potential you had, and have, and I knew that I had to make sure you saw it too.
Now you're almost grown up, and you'll be driving soon and having *gag* girlfriends, so, you might not need me as much anymore. Which makes me sad, yet happy. I know so wholeheartedly that no matter where life takes either of us, where we may end up, and how busy our lives may be, we will always make time for each other. We will always be number one in each others minds. I just hope that you know how much you are worth. I hope you see how smart you are, how funny you are, how talented you are. I hope that you realize that you have the potential to be whatever you want to be. But, most importantly, I hope you know that I will always be your biggest fan, your support system, your #1 person to ask if your shoes look okay with your shirt. I will always, be your best friend.
-Your "not so big" but always older, sister
