Despite what society has to say about it, there is absolutely nothing wrong with being alone. In my opinion, there are actually quite a few benefits to spending some quality "you time."
Why is there so much fear and stigma in being alone? We are often clouded by the impression that we need to be surrounded by people at all times. We cannot risk being in public places by ourselves. I think the reason for this is because, as humans, we are social creatures. Both in the sense that we need to interact with other people and also in the way that we care about our social status and reputation. If you fly solo to a social event or eat dinner by yourself in a restaurant, the perceived message is that you simply could not find anyone to go with — i.e., you clearly don’t have friends. However, in most cases, this is utterly untrue. Being alone is not the same thing as being lonely.
Being alone gives you time to think. Most importantly, it enables you to think for yourself. The possible influence of groupthink is minimized (clearly) when there is an absence of group. You are provided with the liberty to make decisions on your own which are wholly based on your own desires. There is time to focus and reflect on your priorities and pursuits.
When you are by yourself, you are much more able to notice the myriad of details around you. You can take the time to taste, feel, observe, and smell all that encircles you; to really take it all in. Whilst we are spending time with other people, we tend to let those constituents fade into the background because our attention is concentrated on the people. Our senses are not meant to be wallflowers on the grand scope of our experiences yet we put them on the back burner.
Similarly, being on one’s own allows you to notice other people that you could possibly engage with. When you are out and about with your friends, you understandably focus your attention on them. If I happen to be alone in a social situation such as at a bar, for example, I feel much more inclined to approach other people. In the end, I make great, new friends. I would not feel the need to do this if I was already with some buddies.
Going out on your own incites you to become independent and self sufficient. You find ways to entertain your mind without other people there to fill the silence. You discover that although it is awesome to spend time with your loved ones, you don’t require their presence in your life every single second. You can survive without it at times and instead gain valuable personal qualities. It is essential to feel complete on your own and not lost if you happen to be by yourself.
Therefore, I am not at all advocating for people to become hermit crabs and lone wolves, but just to learn to appreciate their own company once in a while. This can be done through any activity whether it is reading a book in a park or enjoying dinner by yourself. Just a few moments like this a week empower you to experience other aspects of life that might go unacknowledged. Noticing the minuscule details about life is what makes it so beautiful.
So, really there are plenty of things to do while you are alone and being so, does not mean you are lonely. For me, being alone is the best and easiest way to push the boundaries of my comfort zone. Merely doing something that everyone else is afraid of is already a step in the right direction. Be fearless and dare to stand out. The qualities and experiences you gain by doing so are priceless.
