Why You Shouldn't Say "I Understand"
Start writing a post
Relationships

You Will Never Truly Understand What Someone Else Is Going Through

Telling someone you understand may not be the best thing to say.

2355
You Will Never Truly Understand What Someone Else Is Going Through
https://unsplash.com/photos/ysiOlHXJM38

There is no combination of two words that I despise more than, "I understand". People say this all the time, and don't even think anything of it. I am definitely guilty of saying "I understand" before, but it never dawned on me how much I couldn't stand to hear it until about two weeks ago. The two words seem so simple and seem like something that would be completely fine to say, but to some people they mean way more than you might think.

Hearing someone say, "I understand" after telling them anything can be very frustrating. You want to scream but you can't because they probably did not mean any harm by saying it. Instead, you're left with the internal turmoil because the words make your stomach churn but you haven't addressed it. These words are so simple but can mean so much to a person.

I do not believe in saying "I understand" after hearing anything unless it is a fact or direction. No matter what, I don't think that anyone will ever understand how a person feels or what they are saying because most of the time those two people did not have the same experiences.

When someone is angry about something, chances are you have been angry like that before too, but you probably did not experience the exact same thing. Even if two people did experience the same thing, you will never truly "understand" how a person is feeling because everyone experiences things in a different way. Everyone has different emotions toward different things or stronger emotions than others.

Sometimes it can be hard to think of anything to say other than something along the lines of "I know, I understand." I know I have done this before without ever thinking about it. Now that my perspective has changed, some things I would rather hear instead of "I understand", would be "I'm sorry", or even just a simple "that sucks". These words seem simple and some may view them as coming off like they don't care.

After realizing that I could never truly understand what a person was experiencing or feeling, it felt like saying "I understand" showed more of a careless attitude. I believe you can understand what someone is saying, but you can never truly understand how they feel unless they tell you straight up.

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
the beatles
Wikipedia Commons

For as long as I can remember, I have been listening to The Beatles. Every year, my mom would appropriately blast “Birthday” on anyone’s birthday. I knew all of the words to “Back In The U.S.S.R” by the time I was 5 (Even though I had no idea what or where the U.S.S.R was). I grew up with John, Paul, George, and Ringo instead Justin, JC, Joey, Chris and Lance (I had to google N*SYNC to remember their names). The highlight of my short life was Paul McCartney in concert twice. I’m not someone to “fangirl” but those days I fangirled hard. The music of The Beatles has gotten me through everything. Their songs have brought me more joy, peace, and comfort. I can listen to them in any situation and find what I need. Here are the best lyrics from The Beatles for every and any occasion.

Keep Reading...Show less
Being Invisible The Best Super Power

The best superpower ever? Being invisible of course. Imagine just being able to go from seen to unseen on a dime. Who wouldn't want to have the opportunity to be invisible? Superman and Batman have nothing on being invisible with their superhero abilities. Here are some things that you could do while being invisible, because being invisible can benefit your social life too.

Keep Reading...Show less
Featured

19 Lessons I'll Never Forget from Growing Up In a Small Town

There have been many lessons learned.

43684
houses under green sky
Photo by Alev Takil on Unsplash

Small towns certainly have their pros and cons. Many people who grow up in small towns find themselves counting the days until they get to escape their roots and plant new ones in bigger, "better" places. And that's fine. I'd be lying if I said I hadn't thought those same thoughts before too. We all have, but they say it's important to remember where you came from. When I think about where I come from, I can't help having an overwhelming feeling of gratitude for my roots. Being from a small town has taught me so many important lessons that I will carry with me for the rest of my life.

Keep Reading...Show less
​a woman sitting at a table having a coffee
nappy.co

I can't say "thank you" enough to express how grateful I am for you coming into my life. You have made such a huge impact on my life. I would not be the person I am today without you and I know that you will keep inspiring me to become an even better version of myself.

Keep Reading...Show less
Student Life

Waitlisted for a College Class? Here's What to Do!

Dealing with the inevitable realities of college life.

117444
college students waiting in a long line in the hallway
StableDiffusion

Course registration at college can be a big hassle and is almost never talked about. Classes you want to take fill up before you get a chance to register. You might change your mind about a class you want to take and must struggle to find another class to fit in the same time period. You also have to make sure no classes clash by time. Like I said, it's a big hassle.

This semester, I was waitlisted for two classes. Most people in this situation, especially first years, freak out because they don't know what to do. Here is what you should do when this happens.

Keep Reading...Show less

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Facebook Comments