You’ve done it, you’ve graduated. You’ve gotten accepted into the program you’ve been dying to get in to. You’ve worked hard to get where you are. And now you get to reap all the benefits. (And all the not so beneficial things, too.)
1. You have your own lounge.
It may be small, but it’s yours. Only you and a select few. Be elite. Feel your new elite status sink in. Undergrads are not permitted in your lounge. Only you, and a select few.
2. There’s a coffee maker in said lounge.
Praise be to the gods that at last you don’t have to buy the overpriced coffee on campus in order to get your fix. You spent enough dollar-and-nineteen-cents on Aramark coffee, and now you get to upgrade to… that’s right, Costco coffee.
3. There’s whole-bean coffee in said lounge.
At last, a coffee that fits your needs. Ground fresh by the pot. It’s even got a cute little tiger on it.
4. There’s no coffee grinder in said lounge.
Ah, well. It’s not all good, is it? I guess it’s BYOC, or BYOCG (Bring Your Own Coffee Grinder), otherwise everyone would have to pitch in for coffee.
5. But there is a nice fridge in said lounge.
Finally -- you can brown bag it erryday. And thank the gods because grad school is f*cking expensive.
6. You feel defensive when undergrads try to go in your classroom.
You know, the classroom where you take every single class? That’s your classroom. Defend it with your life.
7. Professors wait until you get there if you’re within five minutes late.
And they take attendance. And know who you are.
8. No sick days.
The syllabus literally says you’re expected to attend every class. No buts, no coconuts.
9. You’re expected to dress professionally
Take off that snapback and put on a suit and tie. And sit up straight, damnit. It’s like catholic school all over again.
10. Your tuition is literally double what incoming undergrads' is.
You know how you got that email where it said tuition in public schools was going down? Did you read the fine print, where it says that grad school tuition, in converse, is going up? Us graduate students had to pay full-price for undergrad -- and now we’re making up the difference in what undergrads are paying. Yay!
11. "More" is expected from you.
Doesn’t matter if you just graduated, it’s time to act like an Adult™.
12. You’re excited and ready to learn!
Sure, it’s going to be an uphill battle, but it’s one you’re ready to start! You worked hard to get this far, pull a Dory and just keep swimming!
You’re going to kill it in grad school, whether or not you actually find that coffee grinder.