So the other day, I posted a picture with my boyfriend (shocker, I know). A friend of mine texted me saying how they envied how happy I look. Flattered, but also confused because what went through my mind is we don't need someone to fill us. My boyfriend does make me extremely happy, but I also know before him I was happy as well. So this just got me wondering, why does this generation just assume we need a relationship to be whole?
My advice to those searching for happiness; look for places and adventures, not relationships. You will never truly be happy if you are using that person to fill your void of unhappiness. They are simply a crutch to get you through. Be happy first, then you can be ready for a relationship. It is like putting a sock on after you put your shoe on; it doesn't make sense and the order does matter. Don't let someone carry you because you can't find your own way -- it is unfair to both of you. You need to grow and find out who you are or who you want to be rather then letting someone decide that for you.
Another thing that is misunderstood: relationships are not meant to be your only light. We should not only seek happiness in a relationship, we should also search for it elsewhere. Maybe your career, sports, hobbies, etc. A good relationship should of course make you happier, as in more happy than you were before (technicalities, ugh I know). Also, going into a relationship not happy with yourself is setting yourself up for failure. A relationship won't work if you can't accept yourself and be happy with the person you are. It's cliche, but it is important to find yourself before a serious commitment. If you go into something hoping that this person will fulfill every need is putting a lot of pressure on your significant other as well as a weak structure.
Do yourself a favor, put yourself first. It's okay to be selfish sometimes. Just because someone updates their Facebook status to "in a relationship," it does not mean that they are living a happier life than you. Other peoples achievements don't make yours small. The grass is green where you water it. So to those of you who are looking for someone to make you happy, stop. You don't need some-ONE you need some-THING. You will never find what you are looking for if you search in all the wrong places.
