You Can't Fix Someone

You Can't Fix Someone

Take this from someone who's tried...

Knowing you can't fix someone hurts. The idea that the only thing you can do is be there for them is not a particularly fun feeling.

“Why am I trying to help someone who doesn’t want to be helped?”
“What am I even doing here? They don’t want me.”
“Why am I even trying to fix someone whose un-fixable? They’re broken.”

These are the questions that you’re probably thinking if you’ve ever been in a situation like mine. One where you feel like the person is pushing you farther and farther, but let me tell you, they may be broken, but who isn’t? Who hasn’t had some drastic thing happen to them that makes them feel like they will never be okay again? If you haven’t been through this, then you will at some point; it will happen eventually. Ask yourself, did you really want help in the beginning? The answer is probably a no. Eventually, you realized that you needed whoever came into your life at that exact moment. You realized that they were there for you even when you didn’t want them. They stayed.

Everyone has some sort of dark secret that they haven’t told many people — if anyone. It’s hard to find someone who will understand what you’re going through and still think of you as someone who isn’t completely crumpled, just chipped or cracked. So, when someone like that walks into your life, it’s almost too good to be true. You don’t want to believe it; therefore, you tend to push them away. You’ll realize that they didn’t fix you but helped mend some of the cracks the best way they could. You fixed yourself; they just gave you the glue to do so.

“Rather than thinking of it as fixing someone, think about it as getting them back to the person you know they can be. A relationship is supposed to help someone else become the best version of themselves.” – J.C., UA Student

You have been put into someone’s life for a reason, whether it is to stay forever or to be there for a short time, you’re there because God put you there. Embrace it. You’re a lucky one. Not only did He see you to be fit for this person, but so did they. Maybe not instantly and with open arms, but they came to embrace you. They want you there for the time being, but they didn’t ask you to fix them because you can’t. So please, stop trying, and just start being there for them because believe it or not, they need you, and you need them just as much.

Everyone has a day that isn’t a particularly fun day. One of those days where you want to lay in bed and eat ice cream and not move from a spot for the duration of the day. It takes the people you meet in the future that make you realize that those days are days of the past. Those days don’t define you. It’s because of the ones who didn’t try to fix you but instead helped build you back to the person that they know you can be. The ones that make you want to get out of bed and go get coffee or go to the gym.

It’s not rare to find those people, but it is rare to be one of those people. It takes so much time and trust that some people don’t see it as being worth it, but trust me, it totally is. You’re blessed to find those people and should be honored to be one. You are doing so much more than you could ever know. It’s because you saw the potential that they had, and you ran with it. You embraced it. You encouraged them to get back up. You encouraged them to fix themselves.

“The LORD is near to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.” – Psalms 34:18

The Lord is kind to those who are brokenhearted. He sends his strongest, most well-fit soldiers to help them. He uses the people He sends to support the ones who have a crushed spirit. He sends His men to do the job He can’t physically do. He sends His joy, grace, and wisdom to the broken, and He acts as the glue. He is so amazing. So amazing that He saw you to be fit for the job. To be fit for a person in a situation. He didn’t see you as perfect but as someone who has been broken before and knows what it takes to move on and heal. That’s His job, and that’s what He lives for and loves to do.

Please take from this that no, you can’t fix a person, but you can hand them the glue. Sometimes, whoever is broken just needs someone to listen, someone who will be there when no one else is. Someone who will cry with them and for them because that’s all you can do. But, if you do it right, you can and will mean more to that person than you could ever imagine. Just you wait and see the amazing things you can do. Watch them grow and eventually become the person who is there for someone else…or maybe you.

Keep doing amazing things in God’s grace, and you will see what He has in store for you. Who knows, you may end up being the person who fills the parts of the chipped and cracked person. Maybe you were the part that was missing.

Cover Image Credit: Mad Mikes America

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Night of March/Sea of Galilee

A Prayer in the Dark

Night of March (A Prayer in the Dark)/Sea of Galilee

The Night overtook me/The Sea consumed me.

I was on my knees on the hard cement/ I was on my knees on the soaked wood.

I was begging You to take this.

I was asking the questions and there were no answers:

“I called out in whispers and tears,

I called out all my fears.

My Mind and heart bittered against one another,

While the soul is hanging on by a tether.

I walked for a good long while,

I must have walked on for a good mile.

Questions, questions in the dark,

Silence, Silence in my heart.

Thud—the answer revealed,

Thud—my mind was sealed.

It seems forever I will say

God, God, please help me.

God, God, please save me, I pray.”

And in the Morning, you shouted across the surface of my soul:

“If I walked the waters of Galilee,

If I calmed the storms of men,

If I split the Red Sea,

Then certainly I can bring you to the shore,

Where joy will overflow and these sorrows will be no more.”


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7 Christian Bloggers That Are 10/10 Must Follows For Millennial Women

The best content for inspiration, advice, and love like Jesus.

There's not a lot I love more than discovering new blogs to keep up with that fuel both me and my love for Jesus at the same time. Therefore, I decided to share some of my go-to blog suggestions that I hope you'll visit for daily doses of relatable and encouraging content. Here are some of my favorite Christian blogger recommendations that you must check out.

Jordan Lee Dooley: Soul Scripts.

Jordan Lee Dooley; what a gal. Better known as her Instagram handle, @soulscripts, she is my all-time favorite and someone I have been following for years now. Not only is her website aesthetically pleasing and vibrant, but invites an atmosphere to welcome your brokenness. Soul Scripts has writings for just about ANYTHING and EVERYTHING you could be struggling with, wanting to celebrate, or some good-to-knows. My favorite thing about Soul Scripts is how open and relatable the information is and that she recognizes and praises how beautifully broken we all are. Jordan candidly shares her own life experiences to speak truth into the lives of all us gals. I’m telling ya’ll, Jordan just GETS IT.

Stephanie May Wilson.

A 10/10 resource for all of your dating, friendship, and lifestyle needs. Stephanie takes these topics and rewires your perspective so that you know and clearly see your identity in Christ. I love reading this blog because it honestly feels like I’m sitting down for a cappuccino with a girlfriend, just catching up and discussing life! Stephanie writes as though it’s a face to face conversation with a close friend and deeply cares about her readers.Would also recommend reading her book, The Lipstick Gospel, because it’s not many pages and will probably take you no more than 3 days to finish (she even offers a free copy to download if you hit up her site!!!!).

Grace Valentine: Enough.

You’ve probably seen me sharing posts from this Facebook page before because I update myself on it at least one a week, it’s just THAT good. Grace Valentine is a force to be reckoned with. When I think of her blog, the C.S. Lewis line “My prayer is that when I die, all of hell rejoices that I am out of the fight” immediately comes to my mind. Grace Valentine displays such vulnerability and admittance about herself to impact and relate to readers in a way that both discerns and encourages. She for real blows my mind about concepts I’ve never thought about, or even subconsciously know but never live out and allow to change my thinking. All I can say is that I am over-the-moon thankful for finding this blog on my feed one day because it saved me from some major potential pain.

Sadie Robertson: Live Original.

Sadie Robertson AKA Duck Dynasty darling speaks passionate and strong truth that really just gets me so hype to do life. Sadie uses both her blog and books to be an encourager of hearts to share the name of Jesus by offering some major soul food. Her blog combines a plethora of different writers and has some incredible content for anything from fear to self-worth. I’m telling you, this is a site where every word is saturated with truth, grace, and honesty all to declare the name of Jesus.

So Worth Loving.

Another blog I really don’t think I’d be able to get through the week without. I come here support, inspiration, and when I’m in the mood to read a truthful, raw story. SWL is actually a company created by Eryn Eddy, and the blog gives off similar vibes to the company; soft, genuine and lovely. SWL promotes self-love by encouraging to “love you, love ppl”. One of my favorite things about this blog is that it’s people-based, SWL invites humans just like you and me to share their story/testimony and gives them a platform to express vulnerability, tragedy, and to inspire others. Not all of the posts are directly related to Christianity, but from reading you’ll be able to tell that Jesus is the foundation of this site.

Gracie Parker.

Just on FIRE for Jesus. Gracie adds a bold and edgy flare to her site where you can find relatable, unique and entertaining content. Simple yet powerful, this blog possesses the heart of Jesus in all of its content, whether it be humor, confession, or raw storytelling. Gracie encourages readers to fall in love with life and the Lord.

Sarah Bessey.

Something I recently discovered and turned into an obsession of mine. I so love the perspective that Sarah Bessey has on life, women and Christianity. With creative titles and mind-altering concepts, Sarah kills the blog game and provides readers with good reads as she supplies both peace and go-getter encouragement. My favorite thing about this site is that by looking at the title of the blog post, you really have no idea what you’re about to read and how it could shockingly and perfectly apply to your life and season of your walk with Jesus.

Cover Image Credit: Pixabay

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