Ever have that one ex that just took your heart and completely stomped on it? I know I do.
Heartbreak is such a hard thing to get over. There's not one simple remedy for a broken heart because everyone heals in their own way. There are 7 stages of grief, which can apply to the grief of a break up as well. Desperation for answers, denial, bargaining, relapse, anger, initial accepted, and finally, redirected hope. If you have even been through a heartbreak or are going through one right now, you have most likely experienced some or all the 7 stages.
My ex and I dated for almost 3 years, and he was all I knew. We spent everyday together and created so many memories. When we broke up, it was like trying to navigate through a strange new world. I went through the 7 stages of grief and felt every emotion that comes with a breakup; anger, sadness, numbness.
The funny thing is, during the time when the break up was still fresh, I only remembered the good and happy memories. I focused on the fun times we had, the laughs, our inside jokes, our routine. I completely disregarded all the bad. The fights, the screaming, the lying, the cheating, and the hurt. I think everyone experiences that mindset at some point. They only remember the good and what's familiar to them, and choose to completely overlook all the bad. Once people stop focusing on only the good, and remember the reasons the breakup happened in the first place they start saying "I regret ever dating him/her." I know I did. I constantly said "I regret dating him," "I hate him,""I wish it never happened," and etc.
I said all that stuff 6 months into our breakup, and now it's been a year. If you were to ask me today if I regret dating my ex, I would tell you no, because I don't. Believe me getting to this point was not an easy journey. Everyone is different, and everyone will go through this process of healing in different paces. Yet, I can honestly say with confidence that I do not regret dating him. Regardless of our problems, our relationship was beautiful. We just began to grow apart rather than together. We changed, and change is okay, change is beautiful.
I always tell myself life is full of lessons. That's how I like to view my relationship with my ex, a lesson. That relationship taught me so much about myself, that I can honestly say I would have never found out if it was not for him. He taught me what I want and do not want in life, in a partner, in a marriage. While in that relationship I learned how to be patient, how to really listen and understand other perspectives. My relationship with my ex taught me so many different things that I will carry with me through life.
So yes, he broke my heart. He tore it into a million little pieces, but I do not regret it one bit. Regardless of the heartache I went through, I grew in that relationship. Going through this helped me find myself. I would not be the person I am today without going through that break up. I would not be the person I am today without the lessons I have learned both from him and from our breakup. Instead of regretting getting my heart broken, I am thankful. Thankful for the experience, for the lessons, for the growth. I am a better person because of it.