Worrying About Control Is A Waste Of Your Time

Worrying About Control Is A Waste Of Your Time

Sometimes, things are out of your control, and that's okay.

There's a lot of things everyone is passionate about; school, work, hobbies, it can really be anything. And because we have so much passion for this things, we can tend to take them very seriously; whether that's sitting down for six hours a day studying for school, routinely working overtime to get everything done on time, or going a night without sleeping just to finish that one last page. While we can have that much passion for something, it would do us well to remember that not everyone else will have that level have passion, or even seriousness, as we do.

One of my biggest passions is writing; whether I'm writing a paper for class, a short story for my own amusement, or even an article for The Odyssey, I have an incredible amount of fun doing it. But what brings me the most amount of joy is when I can write my own worlds, creating people and places that all have a multitude of stories to tell. Honestly, I think that's my calling in life, to create these stories, regardless of what they say; I just have so much passion for it that I really cannot see myself stopping anytime soon!

Of course, along with this passion comes an equal amount of seriousness; if I am writing something, then I am sitting down and doing it god damn it, and nothing is going to stop me otherwise. And as a result, I expect other people to have the same amount of respect and seriousness for my work that I do, because what's the point of making anything if people aren't going to give it the time of day? Now, most of the time, I don't have this kind of problem...but there have been a couple of times where this has been the case.

A little bit of backstory first, however. I run a role-playing game with a large group of friends; I create the world and story, they create their characters and have fun in my world and story. I absolutely love it and have put a fair amount of hours into crafting everything to my expectations, even if it can be mediocre at times. However, my friends to tend to come into the game and screw everything up, but that's completely okay! In fact, I routinely come into the game hoping that that will happen, it's what makes the game so much fun!

The only thing that I ask of my players, however, is to be just a tad bit serious about the game sometimes; whether that's them listening to a very dramatic scene that I put together, or them just getting their work done so we can play the game, all I ask is that they show a tiny bit of respect for the amount of time and effort that I have put into this campaign, if you will. Fortunately for me, more than half of them do this, and it warms my heart to see it...however there are still some problem people.

I won't go into any specifics, as there is a moderate chance that they might read this article in the near future, and I don't want to offend anyone. But some of these people...just give me massive headaches! They don't take my work seriously, at all. Their actions, body language, and conversations both inside the game and outside show that they couldn't give two shits about what I've done, and honestly, it irritates me to no end.

"But Jake!" you might say, "It's just a game! Why get so worked up and offended about it all?" Well, random reader, I agree with you to some extent; this whole thing is just a game, and getting worked up about it is like getting worked up over your favorite characters from a TV show not getting together, or getting worked up over the title of a book because it's slightly offensive. However...try to see things from my point of view.

I have sunk almost a years worth of work into this game, and as a writer, I would like to see my work to the end; I don't give up halfway through and call it quits, if I make something, I WILL finish it. Which makes the whole situation even more irritating! They look at this game and think that it doesn't matter, that it's fine to just never, ever, take seriously. Thankfully, the majority of my players are not like this; they know how much time and effort I've put into this, they know that I am absolutely in love with the characters I've made; they know this, and their actions show it.

It's just...amazing to see this blatant disrespect. Even when their friends are taking everything seriously, they still see it as something that isn't worthy of their attention. And I've wrestled with this for some time now; do I bring it up to them? Do I ignore it and let the other players get frustrated at them? (Because believe me, it's happened.) Do I just cut them out entirely and say, "Tough shit, you should have taken things more seriously"? It took me a while but I finally came to the best solution: let it happen.

Now, why would I do something like that? After all, I just got done ranting about how frustrated I am at them. So why, in my sane and rational mind, would I just let it continue? Well, the answer is simple: life isn't fair. I can't control what people are passionate about, I can't control what people take seriously, I can't control any of that! So it isn't worth my time and energy to be frustrated.

If I can't change it, what's the point of thinking about it? Luckily, in my situation, those who do take the game seriously have said in not so pleasant terms that they are getting pissed off by how they treat the whole thing. They all claim that I don't have do any of this for them and that they should show some respect for the amount of time I've dedicated to the game. Thankfully, it has worked on one of them, but not the other; but the important thing is, is that it's not me who's doing the talking.

I guess what I am trying to get across is that not everyone you meet in life, be it your friends or family, will give you the amount of seriousness you think you deserve for something. And that's okay. You can't control how they feel about, the only thing you can do is to tell them, or in my case, have other people accidentally tell them, that you don't appreciate their lack of respect.

Maybe they do a complete 180, and apologize for their behavior...maybe they still just don't give a shit and simply refuse to take anything you do seriously. Whatever your outcome, just remember...you can't control every aspect of your life. Once you start to practice that mantra, life gets a little bit easier.

Cover Image Credit: hgcommunications

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The Hairdo Diaries

The average day of a girl who just lost half her hair volume.

I am unpleasantly awoken by a blaring alarm at 8:30 am telling me it’s time to get my butt up if I plan on making it to Organic Chemistry on time. So naturally, I snooze the alarm for 10 more minutes before even considering crawling out of my comfy warm sanctuary. When I finally do find it in me to stumble out of bed I groggily head to the bathroom, pulling my hair into a top knot on the way. I pause mid-stride as I am momentarily confused as to where half of my hair has gone.

Light brown hair that used to reach my mid back now only falls at roughly my shoulder. Since its early it takes me a second to remember that little over a week ago I hacked it all off. Coming from someone who used to cry when I was forced to trim my ends, this seven inches shorter thing has taken some getting used to. When I finally do reach the bathroom I have roughly ten minutes to be out the door so it’s go time.

After a quick brushing of teeth, it’s time to tackle the monstrosity that is my bed head. Back when I had long hair it was impossible to deal with in the morning. It was a tangled disaster every morning but I wouldn’t even dream of combing it since it would cause the loose waves to frizz and resemble the main of a horse. Since cutting it all off, I no longer have to deal with that frizzy disaster. It does seem though that I have traded one problem for another as now my hair sticks straight up in the morning and refuses to sit down atop my head. Instead it choices to resemble Mount Everest or one of the girls’ hair from Jersey Shore. With a frustrated groan, I run a comb through it and stick it back into a bun before garbing my bag and heading out the door.

It is less than two minutes later when I meet up with a friend to walk to class that she informs me that I missed a huge chunk of hair at the back of my head that is not secured in the top knot. I grumble that I didn’t miss the piece of hair but rather the piece of hair decided that it didn’t want to play nice. I silently curse myself for not taking the time to secure shorter pieces of hair at the back of my head with bobby pins because they’re simply not long enough to stay in an up-do by themselves.

When I finally reach class, I am now faced with the difficult decision between trying to blindly half up half down my hair or throwing it into a low pony and looking like a colonel man. There’s a huge chance I’d have a lumpy half ponytail at best but it’s better than looking like Paul Revere with a tiny low ponytail and shorter wispy pieces of hair framing my face. When I finally am able to reach the bathroom I do my best to deal with the situation but eventually, give up and throw my hair into the classic man bun. At least now I look like a cool hipster teenage boy instead of a revolutionary one.

As I continue my day on campus I am meet with the unavoidable question that has haunted me for the past week without fail. Whenever I run into anyone I do not see on a regular base I am undoubtedly questioned “oh. Did you get a haircut?” I must then attempt to refrain myself from spitting out some bad line about dying my hair invisible. When I respond that “yes, I did, in fact, cut my hair” I am meet with pretty much the same line of “it looks so healthy!” Whether it is good or bad that that is the number one comment I’ve gotten so far is still up for debate.

When I finally do get home and grab the opportunity to shower I am reminded of my hair, or lack thereof, as I make the mistake once again of attempting to use too much conditioner. This new hair to conditioner ratio is the trickiest math problem I’ve done in ages apparently. Once out of the shower I’m reminded of the perks of the new hairstyle as it takes me approximately ten seconds to comb my hair. I am further reminded when my hair is air dried in less than ten minutes. I do run into an issue with the new length however when I look in the mirror and am stricken with how curly my hair is. What was once mild long waves has been replaced by very short and very curly locks.

With the shoulder length brown curly hair, I now sort of resemble those portraits of Jesus. Now I just need the sandals and the robe and the two of us will be identical. When the time comes for me to attempt to style my hair for a night out, all hell breaks loose. I can’t really curl it because my hair won’t keep loose waves but tight curls stick up and make me look like little orphan Annie. Straightening it isn’t much better as it won’t really stay straight for more than ten seconds anyway. When I finally give up and change into clothes that aren’t legging and a T-shirt I can’t help but look into a mirror and think “oh so that’s what my shoulder looks like in this dress.”

Cover Image Credit: Savanna Lloyd

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10 Necessities All Equestrians Should Have In Their Ring-Side Backpacks

Your guide to the perfect ring-side backpack!

There's hardly ever a time where you won't find me in the barn without my backpack. Stocked with all of my riding essentials, especially at shows, I've created a list of my top 10 necessities to keep when ring-side!

1. Hairnets. They stretch, they rip, and they disappear... so always have a backup pack!

2. Boot polish. Squeaky clean boots are a girl's best friend!

3. Water bottle.

So, you should too!

4. Power Bank. So you don't have to worry about your phone dying and you can get every minute of your ride on video!

5. Snacks

6. Fluff Monkey. Perfect for last-minute ring-side touch ups/wipe downs of boots!

7. Extra hair ties. Just like hairnets, hair ties also break and disappear. But, they are absolutely necessary!

8. Black shoelaces. No number string? No problem!

9. Band-Aids & Neosporin. One word: blisters!

10. Advil/Tylenol. You might not feel it now, but you're going to in the morning!

Cover Image Credit: Pexels

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