The past few weeks of news coverage has been completely taken over by Primary Pandemonium. I love being informed as much as the next guy, but every time I hear the words “campaign,” “caucus,” or “primary,” another part of my soul shrivels up and dies. The worst part? The campaign commercials haven’t even really begun to invade our daily lives.
In order to break up the drivel of Trumpisms and the strangely nice love-fest happening at the DNC, here’s a shout out to the other 6.5 billion people who are a little more preoccupied with world issues.
North America:
Because when people think of North America, they just mean the US, right?
Canada is basically peaceful and cordial as usual and their new PM (Justin Trudeau) is basically the new Ghandi.
Mexico is still struggling but doing their best and still trying to find those missing students.
South America:
Besides the ever-present drug cartels, regime changes, or Zika Virus, it was Mardi Gras and Carnival! So let’s celebrate the festivities and culture that helps us to forget how corrupt government can be.
Africa:
China (which we’ll get to later), has managed to monopolize… I mean “help” Africa through their own version of colonization. Ironically enough, six out of the top 13 Fastest Growing Economies are from Africa -- ahead of China. So let’s end the rhetoric that Africa needs to be “saved” since the USA has their fair share of problems to resolve as well.
East Asia:
Happy Chinese/Lunar New Year!
China: Despite the fact that their economy is basically a shit show, China is finally starting to realize the downsides of naïve capitalism. It is also still under fire for a lot of human rights violations, but there is slow but sure progress with world relations due to the TPP.
Japan has managed to captivate the world (yet again) with the Pokémon craze in their new Super Bowl commercial. Other than them dominating the gaming industry, Japan is in the hot seat for their declining population.
South and Southeast Asia:
Taiwan and Nepal have suffered from recent earthquakes, which has gone largely unnoticed by American media (shocker). Thankfully BBC is on top of their shit and also acknowledges the advances made in India.
The Middle East:
Syria is still in shambles and it is still mind boggling that Turkey, Lebanon, Jordan, and Germany (woot woot) have all accepted well over 5 million refugees combined while the UK was bitching about receiving 20,000 refugees. Gotta love the free world.
and of course...
Russia:
Putin is running rampant per usual. Just in case you missed his antics, here’s a reminder of how wonderful the Great Poo Tin™ is.
