Dear Grandpa,

It's been a while since I've thought of you. Every year I visit your grave with my parents. Every time my mom talks about you, she cries. My grandma cried for a long time after you were gone. After spending so much time building up your family, you left peacefully in your sleep.

When you left, I was 13. I saw my grandma, mom, aunt, and dad crying at the funeral. My parents kept me away from the ambulance scene and didn't let me participate in any of the funeral preparations. I saw you for the last time at the funeral. I heard different stories about how you fought for your faith, about how you are a man of few words but honorable.

I never cried at your funeral. In fact, I hardly cried for you at all. I lived with you for quite a long time, but our relationship was pretty much you messing with me. In the few times that you were serious, you taught me how to be free. With you, it was always about playing and enjoying life. You were the one who taught me how to ride a bike. I remember feeling betrayed after you let go of the bike the second time I tried riding. I was a fast learner, so you didn't need to teach me much, but you let go of the seat really fast, grandpa. Along with grandma, you were simply there for me in my childhood. Of course, I loved grandma much more because she used to chastise you when you made fun of me.

When my mom and I moved out of your apartment at seven years of age, I heard my mom crying in the bathroom. She told me that you would sit outside the apartment waiting for my mom to come back home. It took you a couple of months to realize that my mom and I would not be living in your apartment.

Sometimes, my mom and dad would talk about your younger days. Those were some of the best dinners I ever had. My mom would share stories about your business brain, your testimony to faith, the suffering you endured for your belief, how you taught my dad your trade, and so many more stories. I realized how little I actually knew about you from our decade and a half relationship.

Thank you, grandpa. I have the good life that you dreamed for your children. When the time comes, grandma will join you and you guys will be a power couple in heaven too. Sorry for not grieving your loss.

Love,

Chenghui