Society Needs To Realize It Is Not Selfish  Women Not Moms
Start writing a post
Adulting

Society Needs To Realize It Is NOT Selfish For Women To Not Be Moms

When a woman decides not have children, her decision does not make her any less of a woman.

146
Society Needs To Realize It Is NOT Selfish For Women To Not Be Moms

"No mothers were harmed in the making of this documentary because this documentary is an anti-mother. Or anti-kids for that matter. Some women choose to have kids, some women don't, and some are not given the choice at all."

The provocative yet powerful statement comes from "Not Kidding," a new documentary challenging the societal expectation for women to have children.

Through online posts, the directors, Bettina Hanna and Trish Pavlecich, found the stars of their film. They interviewed women from as young as 11 years old to as old as 70 years old living in Pacific Beach and Encinitas. Opening up about their personal experiences, these women shared the ups and downs of not being a mother. Hanna and Pavlecich hope to expose and educate people about the controversial topic.

In an interview with La Jolla Light, Hanna said: "'I feel the need to show everyone that women don't need to follow society's standards. No woman without children should feel isolated because one never knows the reason behind that fact.'"

Women have various reasons as to why they abstain from motherhood.

For instance, 1 in 5,000 females suffers from Müllerian agenesis, a condition that impacts the reproductive system. When a woman is affected, her vagina and uterus may be underdeveloped or absent even though the outside appearance is normal. The condition prevents women from becoming pregnant.

Other women may find themselves infertile after trying for an entire year to conceive. 6.1 million of them are affected by infertility in the United States. Individuals that do carry a pregnancy but have problems staying pregnant fall into the category as well.

Financial and emotional factors also come into consideration, focusing on the increasing cost and high-demanding responsibility of having children.

Giving birth comes with a huge price tag. Vaginal delivery can go from $3,300 to as high as $37,200 while C-section goes from $8,300 to $71,000.

From 2000 to 2010, there was a 40 percent rise in the cost of having kids. According to a research by USDA in 2015, American parent spent an average of $233,610 to raise a child from birth to the age of 17.

Taking care of a child takes a lot of work and effort, so a mother should be emotionally prepared for whatever she may encounter along the way especially for someone who also wants to have a career. Working moms will endure high-level stress as they balance their job and family.

"Generations of girls have been told they can achieve anything they aspire to, including having both a career and children—and many women have done so," Claire Cain Miller stated in her piece for New York Times. "But at the same time, both work and parenting have become more demanding."

Women should not be judged for the decision not to have children because of aspects concerning physical and mental health and money influence it. It is not a matter of being selfish to refuse to live up to society's standards for them. They are free not to bring another life into this world if they are not prepared to take that kind of responsibility.

As Vivian Blackstone, a 90-year-old who watched "Not Kidding," expressed: "There is a stigma...Women are still boxed into a category and we want them to fit into a pigeonhole."

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
the beatles
Wikipedia Commons

For as long as I can remember, I have been listening to The Beatles. Every year, my mom would appropriately blast “Birthday” on anyone’s birthday. I knew all of the words to “Back In The U.S.S.R” by the time I was 5 (Even though I had no idea what or where the U.S.S.R was). I grew up with John, Paul, George, and Ringo instead Justin, JC, Joey, Chris and Lance (I had to google N*SYNC to remember their names). The highlight of my short life was Paul McCartney in concert twice. I’m not someone to “fangirl” but those days I fangirled hard. The music of The Beatles has gotten me through everything. Their songs have brought me more joy, peace, and comfort. I can listen to them in any situation and find what I need. Here are the best lyrics from The Beatles for every and any occasion.

Keep Reading...Show less
Being Invisible The Best Super Power

The best superpower ever? Being invisible of course. Imagine just being able to go from seen to unseen on a dime. Who wouldn't want to have the opportunity to be invisible? Superman and Batman have nothing on being invisible with their superhero abilities. Here are some things that you could do while being invisible, because being invisible can benefit your social life too.

Keep Reading...Show less
houses under green sky
Photo by Alev Takil on Unsplash

Small towns certainly have their pros and cons. Many people who grow up in small towns find themselves counting the days until they get to escape their roots and plant new ones in bigger, "better" places. And that's fine. I'd be lying if I said I hadn't thought those same thoughts before too. We all have, but they say it's important to remember where you came from. When I think about where I come from, I can't help having an overwhelming feeling of gratitude for my roots. Being from a small town has taught me so many important lessons that I will carry with me for the rest of my life.

Keep Reading...Show less
​a woman sitting at a table having a coffee
nappy.co

I can't say "thank you" enough to express how grateful I am for you coming into my life. You have made such a huge impact on my life. I would not be the person I am today without you and I know that you will keep inspiring me to become an even better version of myself.

Keep Reading...Show less
Student Life

Waitlisted for a College Class? Here's What to Do!

Dealing with the inevitable realities of college life.

95744
college students waiting in a long line in the hallway
StableDiffusion

Course registration at college can be a big hassle and is almost never talked about. Classes you want to take fill up before you get a chance to register. You might change your mind about a class you want to take and must struggle to find another class to fit in the same time period. You also have to make sure no classes clash by time. Like I said, it's a big hassle.

This semester, I was waitlisted for two classes. Most people in this situation, especially first years, freak out because they don't know what to do. Here is what you should do when this happens.

Keep Reading...Show less

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Facebook Comments