I used to dream of being a boy. Life would be simple then, wouldn't it?

Covered from head to toe, I would always come home in a thick layer of dirt during the long Oregon summer months. Underneath the dirt, my legs were spotted in bruises from the constant falling and tacking I would do with the neighborhood kids. The neighborhood boys were my best friends, the ones who taught me everything from nerf guns to how to punch. I was the older of two girls in my house, but at heart, I had grown up in a family of boys. I'd spent my summer days tanning as I hid in mystical tree house forts and hunting make-believe animals.

Despite my anatomy, growing up, I was seen as one of the boys. They would pin me underwater just like any other boy and never go easy on me during our infamous war games.

My gender, as a cis-female, never caused me to stop dreaming.

I had surrounded myself by strong women in my life. My mother was an Italian immigrant with English as her fourth language, who was raising her children in a military household while obtaining her Bachelor's and Master's degree in business, graduating from both with a 4.00 GPA. My dad's father passed away suddenly when he was 12 years old, leaving his mother behind to raise two teenage boys with no formal education. All around me I had women showing me that it is possible to do anything in life.

My father always pushed my sister and I hard in school growing up, wanting to show us that we did not need a man to take care of us later in life, that we were both smart and capable to do so ourselves. I never once in my life remember a moment where I heard them say, "That's for a man to do," or, "You need to act like a girl." I am blessed that I had those two remarkable women and my father who were part of my upbringing, because the truth of the matter is, as little girls growing up in the peak of the 21st century, the gender role and idealism placed on femininity is highly still pressed upon our shoulders.

At nine years old year old I was told that if I did not learn how to clean, no man would ever fall in love with me.

Flash forward to the first week of sixth grade. I had run up to my childhood best friend, my fellow bug collector, who immediately told me I couldn't play with bugs anymore because I was a girl.

In eighth grade, I was being told I could not play baseball because I was a girl. Leading to spring of my eighth-grade year, I was forced to play on the girls' softball team as I daydreamed looking over at the boys' team, wishing I was running and striking them out. Instead, I was getting yelled by the girls on the team to throw softer.

Later that year, there were arguments about how I had to wear a dress to a wedding when all I wanted was to wear a suit.

As I got older I kept telling myself, "Damn, if only I was a boy."

Growing up, I could feel the strangling of society and their gender roles. Its grip around my body tightened, the lack of liberation became too common. My butt slapped at school? That is just a regular Tuesday. Football players pulling up my cheer skirt? The school just decided that we cheerleaders shouldn't shake their hands after the game.

As I look for a career, I feel the pain of society once again gripping its fangs into my body. The venom of shaming women for entering a competitive and demanding work field, instead of staying home and bearing children. That it is impossible to have both.

My dreams have been labeled foolish and unacceptable for women because it is safer for a man. I get suggestions for careers that are more suitable for women. I get reminded that "my place" is in the household. "Go make a sandwich," as I hear guys say.

Being a woman does not mean you have to choose between family and living your dream. Being a woman shouldn't mean that I should be scared of getting raped in my dream job, while a man doesn't. Or that I should face job limitations.

Being a woman is powerful. Being a woman is courage. Ladies, don't forget that. I dreamed of being a boy so I could do those things. But, your gender should never be a limitation of your dreams. Motherhood, career, both, you can have it all. Don't let your gender ever press pause on your dreams. It is time to un-pause and dream big again.