To The Twenty-Something Woman Who Feels Like Everyone Is Getting Engaged, Except Her

To The Twenty-Something Woman Who Feels Like Everyone Is Getting Engaged, Except Her

"Choose to love everyone with the same fervor as a bride loves her groom."

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If you're that young single woman who sees an engagement post on her Facebook feed at least once a week, congratulations! You're in a pretty crappy place in life. It's the holiday season, so that makes things doubly crappy. Some might call that pessimistic, but I think it's just the truth.

Your girlfriend goes out and finds the perfect wedding dress, and you're sitting in your 8AM class wearing the same sweater for the third day in a row. Your childhood bestie and her fiancee always talk about how in love they are, and you can't even get your cat to snuggle with you. That girl you do everything with has a huge rock on her perfectly manicured nails, and your hands look like little stumps. It's a constant comparison of you and every engaged person you know. It seems like it can't be helped. You're surrounded by wedding plans and photos and brunches and, worst of all, love. The very last thing you want to do is think about love. Being single when all your friends are engaged sucks. I'm not here to tell you it doesn't. If I tell you that "someday your prince will come", then I'm playing God, because I don't know what will happen to you, or me, or anyone else.

But, as much as this season of life sucks, you can still gain something invaluable from it.

I believe that God created marriage as a symbol of His unconditional, redeeming love for us. When two people enter into the covenant of marriage, they promise to put the other person's needs before their own and to be devoted to them in spite of their shortcomings. Now, think about your engaged friends and their husbands-to-be. As much as you love them, they all have shortcomings. She talks a little too loudly and he doesn't speak up when he should. He's super messy and she's obsessively clean. They both forget to apologize, but when they do, it's never with much eloquence.

All these faults might seem to be deal-breakers for a relationship, but, as cheesy as it sounds, love can conquer any sin or shortcoming in our lives.

Love does two things: It takes a broken person and reconciles them to God and it takes two broken people and reconciles them to each other. The good news is, you don't have to be in a relationship, engaged or married to experience this amazing, restorative love. It can be found in friendships, mentorships and families. This supernatural love is so powerful that it can even be found in strangers. That's right, you don't even have to know someone to love them wholly if you have God's love in your heart. That is a power that no one can take from you. You have to choose to harness love and use it in your everyday day life; no one can make you. But, I promise that if you choose love, you'll never regret it. You will find fulfillment in your singleness, meaningful relationships, and a newfound perspective on all your engaged friends.

Choose to love everyone with the same fervor as a bride loves her groom. It's what we were put on this Earth to do.

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An Open Letter To My Boyfriend's Mom

A simple thank you is not enough.
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Your son and I have been dating a while now and I just wanted to thank you for everything.

Wow, where do I start? Ever since the day your son brought me into your home you have shown me nothing but kindness. I have not one negative thought about you and I am truly thankful for that. I first and foremost want to thank you for welcoming me with open arms. There are horror stories of mothers resenting their son's girlfriends and I am blessed there is no resentment or harsh feelings.

Thank you for treating me like one of your children, with so much love but knowing exactly when to tease me.

Thank you for sticking up for me when your son teases me, even though I know it’s all in good fun it's always comforting knowing you have someone by your side.

Thank you for raising a man who respects women and knows how to take responsibility of mistakes and not a boy who is immature and doesn’t take responsibility.

Thank you for always including me in family affairs, I may not be blood family but you do everything you can to make sure I feel like I am.

Thank you for letting me make memories with your family.

There is nothing I value more in this world then memories with friends and family and I am thankful you want and are willing to include me in yours. I have so much to thank you for my thoughts keep running together.

The most important thing I have to thank you for is for trusting me with your son. I know how precious and valuable he is and I won't break his heart. I will do everything I can to make him happy. This means more than you could ever imagine and I promise I will never break your trust.

The second most important thing I must thank you for is for accepting me for who I am. Never have you ever wished I looked like another girl or acted like another girl. You simply love and care for me and that’s all I could ever ask. Every person in this world is a unique different person and understanding that means a lot.

The third most important thing I must thank you is teaching me how to one day in the future treat a potential girlfriend that I may interact with as a mother. I am not a mother, but I one day plan to be. If I ever have a son it is because of how you treated me that I am able to be a humble loving mother to this new face that could one day walk into my door. How you have treated me has taught me how I should one day be in the future and I thank you for that.

This may seem all over the place but that’s how my brain gets when I try and thank you for everything you have done for me. It’s all so much and even the little things are so important so I promise my scattered thoughts are all with good intentions and not meant to bombard you. I just want to get the idea across to you that you are important and special to me and everything you do does not go unnoticed.

Sincerely,

Your Son’s Girlfriend

Cover Image Credit: Christian Images and Quotes

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11 Of The Biggest Tinder Red Flags All Single Women Need To Swipe Left On

The red flags a woman swiping for men shouldn't ignore when it comes to finding someone on Tinder.

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Ah yes, the magical non-dating application that seems to be the go-to for most college singles looking for amusement in their uneventful Saturday night scheme: Tinder. Foreign to those who choose to meet other people in real life as opposed to over the internet or through social media, Tinder is widely popular on most colleges campuses, though one doesn't have to be a university student to make an account. For the readers who are familiar with the swipes of the dismissive or approving nature, you know what I mean when I say that some Tinder accounts aren't "swipe right" worthy. For the woman seeking man on Tinder, these are the 11 biggest red flags.

1. Grammar mistakes

bye

A tale as old as time: being turned off by someone's grammar incompetence. Did he go to the seventh grade? Most likely. So really, this is just a lack of caring on his part. He doesn't care about wooing someone with his articulate dialect? Oh, okay. Swipe left.

2. Risky bio

what why

There are honestly a number of examples of the "risky bio." I once saw a bio that said, "I sell drugs." I'm not joking. Red flag.

3. Their first pic is of them flicking off the camera

bye

I'm personally offended by this man already. Swipe left.

4. The shirtless mirror pic

no

Glad he's confident, that's cool, really. But there's just something about the image of a man standing in front of his dirty bathroom mirror searching for the right angle that is so strange. Just thinking about the multiple attempts that picture could have taken irks me.

5. Boomerang video of them vaping

so hip

Does he still have one of those? Okay...First of all, if vaping is such a significant part of his life that he has to share it with the world, at least he could blow some O's or something, the video playing back-and-forth of that cloud he's blowing is of minimal difficulty. At least try to impress.

6. Boomerang video of them chugging a beer

This isn't Barstool, this is you (the swiper) deciding whether or not a guy worth possibly meeting out in the real world. And while I would be impressed, you don't really know how long it took him to finish chugging that beer. He could have taken minutes, or not even finished the whole thing. Swipe left.

7. Only one picture

scam

Okay, there's only one picture of him in his Tinder profile - this is obviously a catfish. I mean, maybe it isn't, but if you trust a one-pictured profile then you have bigger balls than I do. And if it indeed is not a catfish, you're dealing with a guy who believes there is only ONE picture of himself out there that could tempt a female to swipe right (an issue in itself).

8. The first picture is of their car

car

Do I even need to elaborate on why this is a red flag?

9. When they admit they aren't the age Tinder has them as

too old for this

Okay, so Tinder thinks he's nineteen but in his bio, he is literally admitting to not being the age he submitted. Like... what? Swipe left.

10.  No pictures of them (only their dog)

dog

Honestly, it's a decent strategy these men have until we realize that we just swiped right on a German Shepherd.

11.  They're wearing a U of L shirt

go big blue

The crimson of all red flags. Go cats.

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