The Woes Of College Dating

The Woes Of College Dating

Categorizing the boys in your life.

With Valentine’s Day right around the corner, I think it's an appropriate time to speak about the woes of dating, hooking up, or meeting potential significant others in college, especially if you’re new to the college scene. I won’t expose all the wild wonders of the college dating world, but I can sure as heck give you the categories I’ve organized boys into since I've been at CofC.

1. The one-time makeout never to be seen again(?)

This is otherwise known as the hookup. Was his name Brad or Brian? You and your friends aren’t sure, but one thing is certain — you’ll never see this boy you kissed at a party ever again. Maybe two years from now when you’ve got your sh*t together, interned at two companies, and studied abroad you’ll see him on campus and think “don't I know him from somewhere?” but probably not.

2. The “I have a girlfriend but do you want to chill” boy

He’ll say, “oh, we’re on a break” or “we’re about to break up,” but just no. Run as fast as you can and never ever look back. He probably messages girls at 2 AM something like “come ova.” He does not have time for a real relationship or time to tell his actual girlfriend that the relationship is not working out. He doesn’t even have time to type the entire word “over” so anything he does is only to benefit him 100 percent. Stay away!!

3. The F***boy

Similar to number two because they are both all about the 2 AM “come over and chill” phone call, but number three is still their own breed. He loves to hang out with his bros. He probably wears white Nike socks and gray dad New Balance shoes while he's drinking with the boys. You’ll never catch him at the library, but you’ll for sure catch him if you happen to be going out on a Wednesday night. He may seem cool to hang out with for a few weekends, but I say run after weekend one because he is only cool with anything that benefits him, no matter who he screws over. He probably claims that he knows how to treat girls, but actions speak louder than words on that one.

4. The Ex

You guys dated in high school or early on in college, but he’s always coming back. Maybe he’s just wondering how you are or he wants to get coffee — the relationship is over and you’ve moved on, but every single time you guys run into each other you end up feeling like something is still there. Don’t question your choices or be a total a** to him, but the past is the past.

SEE ALSO: 5 Ways To Move On From A Toxic Relationship

5. The One

He might be the one or maybe not, but right now he is pretty great. There aren’t any red flags, he makes you feel good about yourself and he genuinely cares about your happiness. You both benefit each other equally. The relationship gives you room to grow as a person, but someone is there cheering you on. He’s happy to listen when you need him and you’re always there for him. He might be in your life forever or just for a little while, but either way, the relationship feels positive. Whether you stay together or not, at the end of the day you feel like you truly gained an understanding of what a healthy relationship feels like and gained a whole lot of self-respect along the way.

Just a note: Some of this is kind of a joke even though shade was thrown in the process.

I think it's okay to kiss as many people as you want, love who you want and do what you want (as long as no one is getting hurt in the process.) There is no shame in finding yourself or what you like, want, or need out of life. I’m truly happy for anyone who is happy. Dating is weird and relationships are complicated. You do you. Live your life. Do what make makes you happy and make sure people treat you right.

Every experience good or bad is an experience — you gain something from everything that happens to you, whether you learn a lesson or learn to love yourself. I learned so much this year and I’m thankful for everything that has happened to me. All jokes about f***boys aside, loving yourself is important, especially in relationships. Be happy with yourself and don’t let crappy people bring you down, no matter what.

Cover Image Credit: College Gloss

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To The Guy That Makes Me Want To Open Up Again

I don’t know exactly why you’re giving me a chance, but I’m glad you are.

It isn’t completely easy to speak my mind.

Actually, scratch that. I speak my mind way too much. Religion, politics-- my views on literally anything? Yeah, I don’t mind telling anyone that.

But, when it comes to my actual emotions, I never want to open up anymore. The only people I feel comfortable talking to are my family and my close friends. And that only happens when I am forced to; if they ask me if I’m okay or check in with me.

The past few months I made sure I had no free time, as I didn’t want to have to be alone to face my emotions. I loved it. There was no room for any negative emotions. Honestly, there was no room for any emotions. If I ever had free time, I’d go to the gym or go on a run. There was no way I wanted free time to let myself feel things again.

However, now that I know you, I actually want free time.

It would be easy for you to push me away like I do to you. I don’t know exactly why you’re giving me a chance (I’m a very grumpy person, you’ll come to realize!), but I’m glad you are.

So, thank you.

It seems like nothing, but to me it is something. Thank you for being the nicest person to me. Thank you for making me feel comfortable. Thank you for taking the COTA even when it’s a .01 mile walk.

Most of all, thank you for making me want to have free time.

Cover Image Credit: Naysa Mooney

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After 57 Years Of Marriage, My Grandma And Grandpa Are The Real "Relationship Goals"

Their hearts are completely devoted to the Lord our Savior.

Valentine's Day. The National Day of Love (as some might call it) has come and left us so quickly. As many took those twenty-four hours to display their love and affection to their special someone, I utilized it as an opportunity to reflect on all the wonderful relationships that surround me.

I am so grateful to observe several romantic relationships in my life that thus cause my future standards to be set much higher. For instance, my mother and father, brother and sister-in-law, and grandma and grandpa all share romantic relationships that set the standards very high.

However, when I was considering all the people in my life that have built these sort of marriages, I couldn't help but think about the ones who established this all: my grandparents.

As I compose this article, I simply can't stop smiling due to how beautiful their relationship actually is. Therefore, I'm excited to further explain why my grandma and grandpa are the real "relationship goals."

So first off, my grandma and grandpa are two of the sweetest humans that live on this earth. Their hearts are completely devoted to our Lord and Savior Himself. Their relationship has solely been established by God, and as they have grown together as a couple, they have also grown closer to the Lord.

Especially as they are progressing in age, I observe how their religious practices are at the center of their relationship, which is something so many admire.

My grandparents have also taken the sacrificial steps to ensure that each other are both content in the relationship. My grandma always inquires about how my grandpa is doing and if there is anything that she can assist him with. This love is reciprocated when my grandpa asks/does similar things to make sure that my grandma is pleased.

Upon visiting them, I can definitely see that their love is deep and never-ending. They will continue to be there for one another in times of need and when life provides them with high spirits.

Finally, my grandma and grandpa share a relationship that was built off of their strong foundation of friendship. My grandparents met through some mutual friends that allowed for them to get to know one another in a more casual manner. They were able to truly value one another because of their unique attributes and thus build a romantic relationship on top of their friendship.

There are so many relationships that obtain great value in my eyes; however, nothing truly compares to the deep love that my grandma and grandpa share.

Cover Image Credit: Every Pixel

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