If I Didn't Have Anxiety
Start writing a post

If I Didn't Have Anxiety

I'd be real life friends with the girls who comment on my Instagram.

If I Didn't Have Anxiety
James Braggs

In a place far, far away, in a world where I didn't live with anxiety, I would be a new me. I am not ashamed of my disorder. In fact, I don't even refer to it as a disorder because it is simply what makes me me. However, I am well aware that my life would be completely different without this small bump-in-the-road. If it wasn't an obstacle in my life, this is how I would live accordingly.

I'd go to church regularly. I don't not go to church because I'm a heathen, I swear. It's just a little too much for me. The idea of sitting in a large group of people makes me unreasonably nervous. Even more so, I don't like the idea of being a "new comer". Please, no, don't introduce me. I appreciate it, but please don't welcome me. Oh, please, don't pass me the offering plate, because I'll have to pass it to someone, too. Someone I don't know. If I didn't have anxiety, I'd go to church as often as I could.

I'd have more friends. Talking to anyone I don't know very well doesn't come very naturally to me. I'm definitely not the kind of girl to ask the girl who complimented my nails at the drive-thru to have a sleepover with me (this is a reference to a video by @hiitaylorblake on Twitter). I want to be, though. If I gave myself the chance, I could have so many friends. If I didn't have anxiety, I'd be real life friends with the girls who comment on my Instagram.

I'd drink more coffee. Okay, this one sounds silly, but let me explain. Coffee is my favorite drink, ever. Unfortunately, though, coffee is known to enhance the symptoms of anxiety. Granted, I still drink it, though. The consequences aren't nearly as sweet as this mocha macchiato tastes. The excessive amounts of caffeine make me a lot more uneasy than I would normally be. This means no coffee before any kind of social affair, hard class, or important event. If I didn't have anxiety, I'd get a venti Vanilla Sweet Cream Cold Brew everyday.

I wouldn't be me. Though I'd love to be able to do these things without being so scared, I wouldn't be who I am without my anxiety. I'm slowly but surely learning to overcome my fears, but I know it will always be there and that's okay. Without this disorder, I wouldn't love as hard as I do. For me, opening up to someone is a big deal. With that being said, I tend to love a lot more genuinely. Without it, I wouldn't be as kept to myself. Though, this can be a negative, I view it as a positive. I don't tell my secrets to just anyone or lay my trust in the hands of just anyone. I am selective and discerning and I like that about me. If I didn't have anxiety, I wouldn't be myself.

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
Student Life

20 Things I Learned By The Start of My 20s

No one expects you to have your life together by the time you're 20, because honestly, they didn't either.

Allyson Foutty

We are all often faced with many life challenges throughout the time leading up to our 20s. Before this time, and throughout it, we often look back at the things we've learned and how they've influenced who we are as people today. Some of my biggest influences were some of the challenges I've faced, but they've taught me 20 important things by the start of my 20s.

Keep Reading... Show less

The Boyfriend Recipe

The ingredients to build a relationship are a little more complicated than just a bouquet of flowers and a box of candy.


Relationships. Long distance or not, significant others are much more than just that. I would be lying if I said I did not love the sweet gestures that only a boyfriend can give. The flowers, funny phone calls, hand holding, breakfast dates, and tight hugs are special but my relationship and many others out there exist on much more than just these little gestures. It is a tricky concoction that consists of one part boyfriend and two parts best friend and would not work without one part or the other. While having a relationship may not be quite as easy as baking a batch of cookies, it has its own recipe (with a few variations for flavor) to follow for a good match.

Keep Reading... Show less
google images

Fashion just keeps growing and changing and old trends are made new! Now, I'm no beauty guru, just a beauty guru wannabe, but personally I have compiled some stylish wardrobe must haves! These can be cute assets to go back to school or just to catch up on some of the latest trends...

Keep Reading... Show less
Student Life

There's More To A Relationship Than Netflix

Summertime is only 93 days of the year, Find something to do!

Tallie Ammar

Summertime is ideal for more than just hanging out and binging your favorite TV series with your friends. Although summer does bring rain and thunderstorms which is perfect for those binging days, take advantage of those nice and sunny days. There is so many opportunities to get out of the house and enjoy the season before the snow starts to come back. Here are 25 interesting dates that are doable almost anywhere for any age.

Keep Reading... Show less
Leilani Encarnacion

Philadelphia has its beauty, but some of you may have not been to some of the most beautiful hidden spots in the city. This summer is a chance for new adventures and exploring, so here are a few places that I highly recommend you should visit at least once.

Keep Reading... Show less

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Facebook Comments