Enough.
What an emotional, loaded word. What does it even mean?
According to Mirriam-Webster, enough is an adjective that means "occurring in such quantity, quality, or scope as to fully meet demands, needs, or expectations; sufficient; plenty; adequate."
So what does it mean when I ask myself every single day, "Am I enough? Is what I'm doing with my life enough?"
I try to keep a positive outlook and keep a goal-oriented mindset, but somedays it's nearly impossible. Some days, it feels like I could hand money out freely and still wouldn't be enough for people. Some days I can spend hours choosing the perfect outfit and making sure my hair and makeup is flawless, yet it's still not enough to make me feel pretty. Maybe, like me, you envy other girls who seemingly "have it all" and you don't think you'll ever find happiness like that. Maybe you don't feel like you're cool enough because you haven't reached a certain number of social media followers. Even if you're the most popular, most social person on campus, you won't feel like you're enough because you're "not that smart" and vice versa. But that person you're jealous of-- she's probably jealous of you because you have something she doesn't.
Do any of these scenarios sound like you? I'm guilty of every single one of them. I can receive 9 positive compliments and one piece of critical feedback, and suddenly all the good doesn't matter anymore. In my mind, I'm a failure because I didn't do everything perfectly.
But guess what? The cool thing about being human is that we have another chance to wakeup tomorro and try again! And you know what else? Who sets the criteria for failure anyway? If you wear sweats today instead of a dress, who cares? What id you stumble upon a word during speech? If you yell at a friend? No one defines your expectations but you. And why would you do that? You should be your biggest advocate,, yours biggest supporter, your #1 fan! "You must love yourself before anyone else can." "Believe in yourself and you can do anything!"
Now-- let's be honest. I know all those things aren't realistic. My life would be so much better and easier if they were, but in reality, I'm my own worst enemy. I'm the one that tells myself I'm not thin enough, not cheerful enough, not outgoing enough, not popular enough. And you know who that hurts? Me. My friends and family also suffer because I dig myself into this pit of shame and failure and then I wallow around in it before I finally decide it's time to climb out.
I'll admit it's hard to find a good balance between positive, cheery Pinterest quotes and sinking into sadness... but it is possible. It will take some work, but you can do it, We must take time to be intentional about self-help. I've told myself encouraging things before just to get through a rough time. "Everything will work out. You're going to be okay. God is gonna take care of this." I've stood in front of the mirror taking silly pictures until I genuinely smiled or laughed-- this is when I feel most pretty. I started a positivity jar where I challenge myself to add one positive thing that happened each day- even if it's just waking up that morning.
There are so many small things we can do to change out mindset and learn to love ourselves. Because even if no one else sees it, you're always enough for you. You are pretty enough, thin enough, cool enough, smart enough, etc. to be yourself and absolutely own it.
