Let me start by saying, contrary to the title of this article, there is no such thing as a “failed” relationship. Every relationship teaches you something. Every relationship serves the purpose of evolving you as a person. Relationships, in the broader sense, are crucial to human kind. You are nothing by merely existing on your own. A person’s significance comes from the effects they have on another. As Christopher McCandless wrote, “Happiness is only real when shared.”
That being said, don’t look for your other half in a person; you won’t find it. You are whole on your own. But becoming “whole” is a gradual process; like a crescent becomes a full moon as the nights go by. The fuller you are, the brighter you shine. Your metaphorical “moon” is comprised of wisdom. Share this “fullness” with others, but don’t think somehow you’ll find it in another. It has to be discovered on your own.
A passage in Neale Donald Walsch’s book “Conversations with God,” resonated and inspired me to write this article. It stated that the conflict in relationships that leads to separation is usually caused by your fixation with the other person. Namely, the expectations you place on them and your infatuation with them. You should invest in and place those expectations on yourself. If you focus more on your individual advancement, you won't have that conflict. A partner should be a source of support. Their presence should challenge you to grow as a person. If you’re both truly living out this mindset then you can’t “fail.” He or she can’t fall short of your expectations because you don’t set any for them. The only expectations you have are the ones for yourself: to be the best person you can be and to impact others in the best way possible.
