I was the queen of being led on in high school. I know that sounds like I'm pitying myself, but trust me, I'm not. I'm only speaking the truth. I'll be honest and say that I have led guys on, and sometimes we don't know it or there is miscommunication. I guess it's just a part of growing up. But then there are those people who do it because it's their "thing" or because they think it's enjoyable. They get some thrill out of it. That's where it isn't fair to someone; it isn't fair to string them along so nonchalantly if you know you don't have any real intentions. Nobody likes being led on or misguided; it hurts and it's just not fun, and you feel totally stupid afterwards. I thought this would end in college, but nope. People still lead people on. This is for all the guys that have done this to me, or for anyone who has done that to a person.
They are human beings.
I have a beating heart and blood flowing through my veins. I am a real person with feelings.
Speaking for myself, I am a grown woman.
I am in college and I don't have time for your nonsense. When I was in high school, I stuck around and dealt with it, but I have bigger goals to invest in with my future love life. If you're just looking for some "fun" because you're bored or because you just feel like it, then you can look elsewhere because I am not interested in being messed with.
Your actions hurt them.
No matter how small, it always leaves some sort of dent in our hearts and how we will trust or not trust other people in the future. This person might have thought the world of you, fell head over heels for you, just to get crushed in the end. Flirting with someone and messing with their heads just for entertainment can damage a person's self-esteem. I'm not making this up. I've been the person who gets led on.
Don't belittle their feelings or "shove it off."
No matter who you are, you shouldn't initially act like it's no big deal. If someone you liked led you on, you wouldn't be too thrilled either. Think about it from their perspective. Belittling someone's feelings and just saying "Haha, I'm sorry. I didn't want you to think that I liked you," and then moving on, even though you were aware that what you did isn't fair.
Your player facade or "swag" isn't cool.
You think leading someone on gives you "cool" points. What? Messing with someone just so you can feel awesome or in control isn't nice. And no, it's not attractive.
This isn't high school.
Two words, especially if you know what you're doing: grow up. This isn't some fun little game. We're all adults here, and when did it become fun to string people along as a hobby? Last I checked, that was more of a high school thing.
You might be labeled the "player" and people will stray away from you in the future.
Yikes, that won't be good. They won't really be able to take you seriously, either. Pretty soon, you might want to settle down, begin really meeting people, and going on dates so you can start a life with someone. However, once people find out about your player reputation, they won't want to go towards your direction. It's kind of embarrassing, and you don't want people to always think that of you, especially if you've considered yourself to be changed.
I know that sometimes we do it on accident and there can be misunderstandings, but this is for all the people out there who are pretty aware of the messages that they are addressing. How would you like it if someone implied that they liked you (even when they knew they didn't) and they meant something totally different?
