Did you know that 93 percent of the emotional impact of a message comes from nonverbal cues, while the remaining 7 percent is verbal? This fact is a clear indicator of just how important nonverbal communication is in our day-to-day conversations with people.
Maybe you’ve never been one to tune into those nonverbal cues and, thus, don’t understand the significance of it. Well, recall the last time you had to listen to someone speaking a language you were unaccustomed to. You didn’t know a word they were saying but were able to pick up on the basics by the speaker’s gestures, facial expressions and tone of voice.
Nonverbal gestures are powerful elements of communication. These gestures tell the listener a lot about how the speaker is feeling. The listener may not know a thing about the speaker but can easily pick up on how the speaker is feeling – if that person is shy, confident, apprehensive and so on. With that said, paying attention to your own nonverbal gesture is something worth noting for more many reasons.
To start, your body plays a huge part in communicating your innermost feelings. In a conversation with someone, you could be saying one thing, but your nonverbal cues are saying something completely different. For example, your friend does something to betray you and you end up confronting that person. Everything you’re saying is what you intended on saying, however, since you were nervous about the confrontation, you’re looking down and your posture is slumped over. Your friend is going to take this as a sign of weakness and possibly miss the seriousness of the issue.
What’s the lesson? Be aware of your facial expressions – if you’re smiling or frowning. Be aware of your eye movement – if you’re being attentive, looking away or rolling your eyes. Take into account your gestures – if you’re nodding your head in agreement or shaking your finger at someone in disagreement.
Next, nonverbal cues are directly linked to how you feel about yourself. Psychologist Amy Cuddy talks about the impact that nonverbal communication has on your self-esteem. She teaches that standing in an upright position with your shoulders pulled back doesn’t just convey confidence to those around you, but it actually changes the way you feel in a situation.
What’s the lesson? You have control over your feelings in any situation. Instead of giving in to your uncertainty in a room full of strangers, pull those shoulders back and tell yourself and everyone around you that you’re confident in this situation. As a result, this will help boost your self-esteem, making it easier the next time.
To add, nonverbal communication gives the speaker a lot of control. If you can master the art of nonverbal communication, you will be very successful in all areas of life: work, personal and relational. Conveying confidence through your gestures, posture and facial expressions will take you far in any career. On the more personal side, nonverbal communication helps to create and maintain relationships. For example, nonverbal cues, such as sitting close and expressing affection, can create and signal the mood of a relationship (in this particular case a strong relationship).
What’s the lesson? Relationships are constantly growing and continuously reaching new levels of intimacy… but only if you allow it. Through nonverbal communication, you have the ability to make the most of any relationship. With that said, always pay attention to how you’re portraying the emotional climate of a relationship and figure out if you’re satisfied with the result. If not, then something needs to change. I would suggest focusing on your nonverbal gestures!
