If the feminist movement were more refined, I'd be a proud part of it. The basic ideals of pursuing equal treatment between men and women in the workplace, as well as tearing down the objectification of women, are worthy agendas. However, I do not call myself a feminist. As of now, there are simply too many inconsistencies littered among the feminist community which I do not want to be associated with.
I realize that not all feminists share the ideals I'm about to explain. I acknowledge that many feminists are smart, educated women who are seeking a more fair society. I can already smell the angry comments that are coming my way, so let me reiterate one more time, I know that not every feminist holds to the following ideals. Alright, with that being said, I think I can safely continue now. Respectfully, here are a few practical reasons why I am not willing to be grouped with the feminist movement just yet.
1. Not wanting to be objectified by men, while still objectifying men.
We've all heard women say, be they feminists or not, "I wish men didn't care so much about appearances!" Fair enough. However, I challenge these same women to check what they and their fellow female friends spew about the male appearance on social media. I can't scroll through Twitter or Instagram any longer than five minutes without seeing, "I like my guys to be at least six feet tall," or, "I won't date a guy who doesn't have a six pack," etc. If we are going to categorize or favor men based on their appearances, it isn't fair of us to get angry when they do the same thing to us because of our breast, waist or butt size.
2. Wanting to empower other women and build them up, while hating women who don't want to call themselves feminists.
I think this point speaks for itself.
3. Seeking equality between men and women, while stereotyping men as dumb, narrow-minded caveman individuals.
If feminists want equality, it isn't enough to empower other women. We must build up men as well! Seeking a fair society while portraying men as idiots in social media, television or even our private conversations isn't going to get us anywhere. Both sexes have their annoyances. Why don't we accept this?
4. Wanting to be able to wear whatever they want without being treated differently for it.
Now this is a tricky one. Of course no woman should have to worry about being harassed or catcalled if she chooses to show more skin. The issue of self-presentation and appearance is interwoven through nearly every facet of life. It simply isn't wise to wear certain types of clothing to certain places, because it isn't always appropriate. Don't believe me? You wouldn't wear pajamas to a wedding, would you? And you would probably turn up your nose at a man who showed up to a job interview wearing jeans and t-shirt. We make judgments about people based on their appearances. It may not be a good thing, but it is, nevertheless, a thing. For example, if I am going to be walking through a sketchy area by myself, I make sure to wear clothes that don't draw too much attention to myself. Unfortunately, there are scummy people out there who make inferences based on someone's clothing choices. No, I should not have to fear that I am more susceptible to having my butt slapped by a stranger because I wore shorts instead of a knee-length skirt. But I am.
For some feminists, this is their whole fight. They want us to be able to wear as little clothing as we want without getting treated any differently than we would if we were fully clothed. As nice as that might theoretically be, it simply goes against human nature and will probably never happen. Men and women are sexual beings. This is not wrong; this is just the way we are. While men should have self-control and harassment is never excusable, women ought to ask themselves a few questions when getting dressed, such as, "Does this outfit imply something about myself that I don't want to portray?" "Is this something that is appropriate for the event I am going to?" Men shouldn't be pigs, and we should not dress like hookers. It makes it easier for both sexes.
And finally,
5. Pushing for equal rights when we already have them, while simultaneously drowning out more important issues.
Last I checked, women are allowed to vote, run for office, compete in sports and go to college just like the men are. Concerning important issues, men and women have equal rights. There are far more groups in the U.S. who I think deserve a louder voice than the feminists who are tired of being catcalled. In our nation alone, there are thousands of homeless people, orphaned children, children being sexually trafficked and immigrants falling victim to violent acts of racism. From what I understand, some of these issues are related to gender inequality. In the sense that we need to raise awareness in order to protect women, I am most definitely a feminist and think everyone should be! That is indeed a worthy cause. Yet, to me at least, lobbying about what I should be allowed to wear seems petty when I consider the other social issues plaguing our country.
Perhaps there is a better use of our time than rallying with the feminists. What do you think?
