We all know someone who very rarely shows thanks or expresses how much they love you. I am one of these people. It doesn't mean I care any less, trust me. I find it much easier to post a cheesy Instagram photo that says way more about how I feel than to tell someone in person.

It's not from lack of trying, there are many times I go to tell Alex that he's the very best person I know, but it usually comes out 'Hey Alex, you're the very best trash I know' or 'Hey Alex, shut up'.

So you're probably wondering why? Well, here it is: telling someone that they make the world better just by being in it terrifies me. My friends and family are great and there is no real reason to be afraid to tell them that, it just makes me squirm. Deep down I have a fear that if I tell them how much they mean that one day if they leave me I won't be able to play it off like I don't care. Showing them how important they are to me makes me feel vulnerable, and I don't really like it. Just the thought of hugging them and telling them I love them makes me uncomfortable to be completely honest.

Now we can go back and try to pin the exact moment where everything went wrong but this isn't therapy and none of you care to hear some tragic backstory. Some people show emotions differently and that's okay. This takes effort on both ends of any kind of a relationship. The person who struggles caring needs to push aside the uncomfortable feeling of telling someone they're great. The friend or family of the other person has to realize that they're trying and not to take it to heart.

I've been truly blessed with some of the best humans to walk the earth. I got lucky with my family, friends I've known for forever and friends I've made at college. My inability to show how much they mean to me doesn't mean that they're any less important. They understand my fears to the best of their ability and what they don't understand they just laugh at. It makes it easier for me to move past when people laugh about it. This is something I've been working on for a long time and I'm making progress but until then just know: I love you guys and thanks for being here.