It is no secret that western culture has a constant attack against women's body image. The norm for the ideal woman is tall, thin, and white, according to popular culture. Lately, there have been campaigns to improve this message, but I have noticed a sickening trend with these movements. It is the phrase "real women."
The words "real" and "women," alone are innocent. Women are beautiful without Photoshop and filters. In natural and honest states, people are perfect the way they are because we are all imperfect.
The issue is when we use this language to exclude others. Saying that there is a real woman insinuates that there is a false woman. Campaigns stating "real women have curves," etc., have good intentions but are dripping with reverse discrimination. This is not an article looking for sympathy for thinner women; it is a plea to end this type of language.
As women, the odds are stacked against us when it comes to how the population judges our appearance and, more specifically, our bodies. However, there is no such thing as an overarching ideal woman. The cliche, "beauty is in the eyes of the beholder," stands true and is cliche for a reason. All judgments aside, standards of beauty vary, culturally, as well. How crazy does it sound if I said, "real woman have small feet," to counter the desire for women to have large feet in rural Indonesia? What are the women who, by default, have larger feet? Are they also false women? No. They are just as real as their petite-footed counterparts. The same goes for all body types. The woman buying size two jeans is just as real as the person in line buying a size 10.
Another interpretation of the phrase "real woman" is that it means the natural, unaltered woman. It sounds tame, but the issue is this type of language still allows for grey area in how one defines "real." A woman who wears make-up to feel beautiful does not fit in this category. Nor does the woman who gets plastic surgery from an injury or insecurity. If we really want to split hairs, the women who shave their legs and underarms are not real, either, by this definition.
All women are real women, and we need to try our best to remember this and not fall to the toxic drama that brought us to this breaking point. We can do this by remembering the enemy. It is not the fashion designers or marketing teams. The enemy is hate, judgement, and negativity. It is within us if we choose to allow it. Fight back with love, acceptance, and inclusion. Be real.
