I have a problem with Pride Month – and no, I’m not homophobic. It’s the same problem I have with Mother’s Day, and Veterans’ Day, and Black History Month, and all those other moments that shine a glaring spotlight on certain groups of people. These events seem paradoxical to me: We nominally accept the members of these groups as simply citizens part of our diverse population, yet we dedicate a specific day (or month) to them such that by definition they are set apart, distinguished, held up on display and highlighted for what makes them different. Imagine if we just behaved toward them as fellow humans worthy of our respect (and particularly valuable for the heterogeneity they embody), but not warranting any – positive or negative – special treatment… Especially given the Supreme Court’s recent ruling, which stresses that mutual appreciation and adoration transcend arbitrary delineations like gender, I cannot help but wonder why it requires a special occasion to remind us to treat all the people around us with equal esteem.

I concede that there is tremendous power in raising society’s awareness about certain crucial topics by all standing together in recognition of them at a specific time. My worry is the converse – that the same people and topics we laud during their designated moment on center stage become neglected, unrepresented, underloved when it’s not the special month or day.

I have been blessed with a phenomenal mother whose positive influence I feel 365 days a year, but she’s only formally recognized on one. What is up with that? And as soon as the calendar flips to March 1, does African American history stop mattering?

In the case of my mom and Mother’s Day, it’s not that bad; she knows I love her (I tell her frequently) even when I’m not sending her Hallmark cards. But for some of the others with designated holidays or moments to shine, the in-between times can be much more dire. As soon as celebrating LGBT individuals slips from our consciousness, implicit biases against these same people seem to take hold as strongly as ever. In between Junes, our behavior is not consistently something to be proud of (pardon the pun).

I do not intend to be a downer, just a realist. To observe the “out-of-sight, out-of-luck” phenomenon in action, let us review some of the statistics on our treatment of LGBT individuals over the past few decades, for example. Check out this timeline:

Of course, there are many more points – both positive and painful – in the history of the LGBT movement than this selective listing includes. Nonetheless, it is interesting to note that some of the biggest milestones happened in Pride Month (June). What if we were always that aware, that accepting, that appreciative of the diverse individuals on our shared earth?

So, I encourage you to march in the Pride parades and eat rainbow rice krispy treats with the best of ‘em...but also please remember that we are all responsible for taking care of – i.e. loving, or at least respecting – each other all year round. On days other than November 11, I hope you will still commend veterans for their service; when it’s not Father’s Day, make sure Dad knows you care.

The principle is simple: Even when it is not any special day, if our standard MO is built on equality, fairness, kindness, and love, we can together make the world a special place.

Make me proud.