There's a breed of girls who have recently emerged on Twitter. They're categorized by their love of wine, pizza, being single, binge watching Netflix and having flawless makeup. They're becoming the butt of jokes for comedians, but maybe they're on to something.
I can give you four reasons why your makeup is better than dating.
1. My makeup is way cheaper.
Sure, the foundation I bought last summer was $60. There's probably an eyeshadow palette somewhere at the bottom of my drawer that's close to $50. But guess what? That's cheaper than paying for all the dates and all the awkward gifts, and all the vacations. Trust me, just buy more makeup and don't date. You'll save a ton of money.
2. My makeup actually stays put.
You can't buy a primer for a relationship (and for those of you non-fluent in Makeup Lingo, that's stuff you put on your face to make sure your makeup stays in place; whether it be at work, class, drinking at the bar, or crying about your current life choices), that being said, I rely on my foundation staying in place for me way before I would rely on a man to stick around. It's already proven to me it's more trustworthy.
3. I don't have to wait for my makeup to text me back.
Look, I'm not the type of girl that keeps close tabs on my boyfriend in a relationship. You do your thing and I'll do mine, and to be honest, I prefer it that way. But when you completely drop off the face of the earth? That's when I'm not happy. With makeup, I don't have that problem. It goes right back in the same cute little bag every night and is there when I wake up in the morning. No wonder if I said something awkward to it, or if it thought I look too fat the last time we saw each other. Old reliable, right there in my bathroom.
4. Makeup actually makes me feel good.
The best part about makeup is that it can't talk (not when you're sober anyway). It doesn't go behind my back and talk shit on me, or text other people stuff that I asked them to keep private. I get more compliments about my makeup than I ever have from a boyfriend, so you'll see my trouble with any argument that dating is more worth my time than makeup. It just isn't.
