You should never compromise your own physical, emotional, or mental well being for the sake of keeping or tolerating a toxic person, whether they are a friend, family member, co-worker, etc.
Listen, I get it. Your connection with a friend or family member is supposed to be a sacred bond that is never broken. We are supposed to love unconditionally and never break that bond, but it is more than okay to distance yourself from a person that is toxic to your life.
Before I continue, let me describe to you what I consider to be a toxic person.
A Judgemental Person
A person who is extremely judgemental to not only you but to others around you.
I am all for constructive criticism, but it gets to a point where constructive criticism becomes bashing on others. Consistent unwanted criticism and constant judgment is not healthy and is completely toxic.
A Negative Nancy
If a person is always focusing on the negatives and never allowing anything positive to show through, then personally, I believe this is a toxic person. There is a saying that goes “surround yourself with like-minded people.” So if you surround yourself with negative nancy’s then what do you expect to become…a negative nancy.
Extremely Dramatic People
People who feed off of drama are the most toxic kind of people. They are constantly trying to stir the pot and can rarely be trusted with any secrets. And let’s be honest… who likes drama?
If you do not know what this means then please pay close attention. Gaslighting is a form of manipulation. Manipulative people know exactly what to say and how to say it. It can often cause drama within a household, friend group, or workplace. People who gaslight others are often those who lie about saying or doing something that literally everyone else knows they did.
The “It wasn’t me” Friend
People who refuse to take the blame for their actions. These are the people who cannot own up to their own mistake, wrongdoing, or lie. This is extremely toxic for any type of relationship because it often can cause problems amongst others.
On and Off Again People
They lash out at you but are your best friends the next day. They play mind games, yell at you, blame you, insult you, are jealous of you, but then turn around and hug you, complain you, and praise you.
Now that you know what I consider to be a toxic person, let me explain to you why I cut these types of people out and why I believe it is beneficial.
I cut out toxic people because I was so internally stressed with trying to please them that I physically and mentally could not do it anymore. I constantly walked on eggshells, I was afraid to show my achievements, and I was scared that they would stop liking me and leave me completely.
But what I realized is that I was so desperate to get them to stay in my life even when I knew that nothing but negative things would come from these people. So I decided to stop putting them first and focus on me.
Now that may sound selfish, and maybe it is, but I can tell you one thing, I am happier.
Of course, I am sad when I realize that these people aren’t as close to me anymore, and I often think about them, pray for them, and definitely still love them. But I cannot continue to put myself last in order to please these people. I cannot continue to exert so much energy onto people who do not want to help themselves.
I am done giving my all when I received nothing in return. I am trying to better my life, continue to spread positivity as much as I can, and ultimately become a better person. And if that means distancing myself from those who make me self-destruct…then so be it.