Like most high schoolers, I was very excited to go to college and experience everything I had been hearing about: new found freedoms, the possibility of not having an eight-hour class day five days a week, living on my own, the list goes on.

I chose my college and began getting everything ready that I thought I would need. I started pretty early, and my best friend was going to be my roommate so we got semi-matching bedspreads and decided how we wanted our rooms to look.

Finally, move in day came, and I was a mix of excited and absolutely petrified. I was excited to get all unpacked and organized, but the fact that I was living away from my family and quite a few of my friends really began to sink in. I tried to ignore that feeling, though, and try to embrace college life.

We were lucky enough to have amazing suitemates that we got along with and are still friends with to this day. We all went to an event the college held for the freshmen to get to know each other, but after a while, we realized that we weren’t getting much from it, so we slipped out during an icebreaker and got pizza. We talked all night, and it is still one of my favorite nights of my freshman year.

As that school year started and I finally got settled in the room, I couldn’t shake the feeling that something was off. I didn’t feel at home at the school, but I just assumed it was because I was new.

I put some effort into meeting new people and met amazing friends, but I continued to feel as if the school I was at wasn’t for me. I began seeing how happy some of my friends were at their schools and how quickly they got acquainted, and although I was extremely happy for them, I wished I could feel the same way.

Time passed and I still couldn’t shake the feeling, so I began talking about it. I wasn’t the only one who felt that way, a lot of people didn’t feel at home where they were. However, whether it was just the fact that they needed some time or to join various organizations on campus, they felt at home. I wanted that feeling so badly, but I couldn’t make it come out of thin air.

I began pondering the idea of transferring: college is only four years (for some majors), and I wanted to make sure I was making the most of them. Toward the last few months of first semester, I signed a lease for an apartment and decided to stay at this school at least two years.

In the school’s defense, there were many things I could be doing to try to meet people, but I was just too lost and confused to try. I do owe a lot to my roommate and suitemates, they were always a constant in my life and made the worst days not too bad, and I couldn’t have survived without them. I also owe many thanks to the friends I did make freshman year, they were the hope I had for returning the following year.

Fast forward to the end of freshman year, I was heartbroken to have to leave my suitemates and the friends I had made during the year, but we all made plans to try to see each other. I tried to stay positive, telling myself that next year I would put my best effort in so if I did decide I wanted to transfer, at least I gave it my best shot. Throughout the summer, I tried to think of ways that I would make sophomore year better, and I began to feel a little more relieved.

The beginning of the year came just as quickly as the summer had started, and I was really excited: this was the year that everything finally falls into place and I would love the school I was at, or I would know, without doubt, that I wasn’t where I was supposed to be and I could then try to find the place I felt at home at.

I had always wanted to join a sorority, for as long as I could remember, but I thought that I may be too overwhelmed if I rushed freshman year, especially since I was so on the fence about mostly everything. I signed up for recruitment during the summer, probably the day the applications opened, and started to imagine what it would be like. I also told myself I would be more social with others I didn’t know in an effort to meet more people.

Recruitment was a few weeks after school began, and I knew from the first day that I made the right choice by rushing. I found my home. I know that may sound cheesy, but I finally found the home I had wanted for the last year. I met so many people through my sorority, and I continue to make friends as time goes on. I make time for new friends in order to keep the relationship going and I try to reach out to friends made last year because they’re great and I wouldn’t want to lose them. I’m not finished with this year, halfway through actually, but I can honestly say I love where I am.

I’m not saying that you have to join a sorority/fraternity to love the school you’re at. I’m also not saying you need thousands of friends because the ones I had and still have are absolutely amazing. Without each and every one of their impacts, I wouldn’t be where I am today. I’m saying to do something.

You create your own destiny; you are the one who can make the day good or bad. Joining a sports team of some kind or even starting a study group in a class can be a move in the right direction.

You have to try: I wish everything good in the world could just fall into our laps, but as we all know, that’s not how it goes. Work for what you want.

I am so grateful I stayed at my school. If I didn’t, I may have missed out on all the happiness it is giving to me now. My advice to anyone on the fence is to try your hardest and give the situation time. If you truly feel as if you have given it your best effort to fall in love with the school you’re at and nothing is working, it may be time to find another school. If you haven’t given your all, give it. You get out of life what you put in, so give life your best effort. You may be surprised to learn, like I was, that what you hoped for was actually already yours.