This August, it will be two years since I gave my life to Christ and was baptized at my home church by my youth pastor’s wife. Since becoming devoted to God, my actions, my words, my personality, and my lifestyle have changed drastically. People sometimes look at me and wonder why I would change so much of who I am for something they see as insignificant or even nonexistent, but I have come to realize that it’s impossible to know Christ without being changed.
I was raised in a Christian home and have attended church my whole life, but until two years ago, I did not know the impact of Christ’s love and grace. I went through the motions of going to church on Sundays and youth group on Wednesdays, but that was the extent of my relationship with Jesus. However, after experiencing a week-long mission trip, my eyes were opened up to what Christ looks like in the lives of people who love Him. I was surrounded by devoted followers of God for nine days, and in that time, I couldn’t help but want what they had: pure joy and peace from God, exemplified in the love that poured out from their spirits. It was contagious. I wanted to experience the kind of purpose and passion they felt toward God, the entity I thought I had known my entire life but had never truly sacrificed anything to follow. I knew if I gave my life up to God, I would experience pure joy as well, and I have.
Knowing Christ’s sacrifice for me has truly changed my life. I know that I do not have to fear man (Psalm 56:11), but instead can have compassion on those who hurt me, praying for them. I do not have to have anxieties about the future, because I know it is in God’s hands, and that He makes all things work together for my good (Romans 8:28). I know that I am forgiven for every sin I could commit against God (1 John 1:9), but I also know that growing together with Him will not start until I begin to cast sin out of my life, because sin separates us from God (Isaiah 59:2). I know that He loves me and I am a child of God simply because I exist, and that nothing I do will stop this love and grace and mercy from being poured out on me daily (1 John 3:1). And I know that this life is not the end for me, because after I die I will experience paradise with my God, where there will be no more sorrow and every tear will be wiped away (Revelation 21:4). What a great existence it is to have purpose in Christ.
But that isn’t all. God sent His Son, Jesus, to die for my sins on the cross. He saw how messed up humans were, and He didn’t want that to stop us from coming to Him, so He gave us a way out through His Son. Jesus was pierced for our transgressions and was crushed for our iniquities (Isaiah 53:5) because He loves us. What a merciful act it was to die for those who did not, and still do not, deserve it. Romans 5:6-8 puts it beautifully: “For at just the right time, while we were still powerless, Christ died for the ungodly. It is rare indeed for anyone to die for a righteous man, though for a good man someone might possibly dare to die. But God proves His love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.” We aren’t worthy of God’s love, but we don’t have to be worthy; He loves us anyway. How could I ignore such an awesome sacrifice? How could I push that aside, insisting to live my own life my own away? How could I not be changed?
Following Christ is counter-cultural. It’s different. Some find it offensive. But that only goes to show how far the word has strayed from what we were made to do: worship God with our lives, spread the Gospel, and love each other. Jesus calls us to be transformed from the ways of the world, and that means not living how I want to live, but knowing how Christ wants me to live and changing my thoughts and actions to match His Word. I can’t follow the world and Christ at the same time and expect to please both; as Jesus puts it, “No one can serve two masters. Either you will hate the one and love the other, or you will be devoted to the one and despise the other,” (Matthew 6:24). But I don’t want to. I want God as my center and I want my heart to be poured out to Him so His grace can be poured out through me.
God breathed life into me, into every person and animal and living being on the planet. He breathed life into the entire universe, set the Earth in motion, hung the stars in place, called the mountains to rise and the seas to rush. How can I not praise Him with my life? This is my calling. This is everyone’s calling, to know God and to love Him and to feel His eternal, infinite love for us. That is why I’m a Christian.
He is jealous for me,
Loves like a hurricane, I am a tree,
Bending beneath the weight of His wind and mercy.
When all of a sudden,
I am unaware of these afflictions eclipsed by glory,
And I realize just how beautiful You are,
And how great Your affections are for me.
And oh, how He loves us, oh,
Oh, how He loves us,
How He loves us all.
And we are His portion and He is our prize,
Drawn to redemption by the grace in His eyes,
If his grace is an ocean, we're all sinking.
And Heaven meets earth like an unforeseen kiss,
And my heart turns violently inside of my chest,
I don't have time to maintain these regrets,
When I think about the way...
That He loves us,
Oh, how He loves us,
Oh, how He loves us,
Oh, how He loves.
