My whole life I was told to love with all of my heart, to always tell someone how I feel and never be afraid to say I love you. Love wasn’t something I thought I should be afraid of or that saying I love you was a bad thing. Over time I’ve come to realize that we are afraid of loving too much and I’ll never understand why, but all I can say is that I will never stop loving the things and people in my life “too much”.

I will never forget the first time that a boy told me that they loved me, I’d like to think he meant it at the time but we were just kids and love and like were not too far apart. Regardless of what it meant, it felt good. My smile reached my eyes, a blush crept onto my face and my body felt warm. My heart was happy and it was the best feeling in the world. That was the moment I realized I wanted to love and be loved for the rest of my life.

Unfortunately along with remembering the first time someone told me they loved me, I remember the first time they didn’t say it back. Saying I love you never used to be something that would lead to rejection and hurt. Those three words were supposed to bring you all the happiness in the world like it did the first time someone ever told me them. My heart was broken when I stood there and realized that this person didn’t love me as much as I loved them, they didn’t love me at all.

At that point, I should’ve been afraid of saying the words I love you and I could have avoided ever finding someone that I wanted to say them too, but what is life without love? I don’t want to be someone who curses love solely because some people don’t love me quite as much as I love them. I’ve come to think that it’s not love we are afraid of but commitment. We are afraid to commit ourselves to one person, to admit that we would want to spend the rest of our lives with someone. We are afraid of being rejected, afraid of someone not loving us as much as we love them and that’s okay.

I’ve learned that not everyone will love you, they won’t always say it back and it will hurt but someday you’ll have someone who you think loves you too much. Someone who gives you butterflies and makes you smile constantly, someone who makes you the best version of yourself and makes you fall more and more in love every day. Whenever you feel like you want to give up on love, think of the time that you felt loved most. Think of how happy you were and what a great feeling it was to be loved.

Be the person that loves too much. Love everyone who comes into your life endlessly because you don’t know who is on the verge of giving up love. You can be the reason someone smiles, the reason someone pushes through another day. Never ever be afraid of loving “too much”. You may get those people who say that your clingy or that you are too invested in the relationships that you have but that is not a bad thing. Love too much, not just those around you but yourself too.