Several months ago, my family started watching some old home videos. If you ever need a laugh, I recommend pulling yours out sometime. They're pretty funny. When we watched the videos, I couldn't help but notice how shy I was as a kid. My favorite video is of me at a preschool program and we are all dressed up as different things and we all have to sing a nursery rhyme or lullaby. I had to dress up as a baby and sing 'Rock-a-bye Baby,' So there I am, front row, in a little white bonnet, a white dress, white socks, and white shoes. The microphone gets around to me, and y'all, I spat out that nursery rhyme as fast and as mono-toned as I possibly could and handed off the mic so quickly it almost dropped. I couldn't believe how shy I was.
This came as such a shock because if you know me, you know that I can hardly stay quiet for 5 minutes. I thought that I had always enjoyed talking to others. If you look up the word extrovert, I promise you can find a picture of me. I am extremely outgoing and social. In fact, I actually hate being alone. But as I think more and more about it, I really was afraid to talk to people back then. Now I am the girl who will go right up to a stranger and start talking. It wasn't until high school that I became more comfortable with myself and with talking to others. And I share this because I want you to know who I am. I want to be vulnerable and share my story with you.
I grew up in a Christian home. At the age of 7, I accepted Christ and was baptized shortly after. While this was a huge step for me in my faith, it wasn't until middle school that I started to truly understand what it meant to be a Christian. I realized at camp one summer that I had to start growing in my faith and being intentional with Christ everyday. I knew something had to change and I knew I had a calling. I was living in a broken world with broken people and I knew it was my job to share the loving redemption of Christ with them! So when school started back I knew I was going to have to dive in head first, sharing the gospel with boldness and unrelenting faith! How was that timid little girl I used to be supposed to share the fullness of Jesus? I was scared and I felt unequipped.
DISCLAIMER: Don't ever think you're unqualified to do something because Jesus is more than qualified.
When we put our confidence in HIM, then we are going to be confident in who WE are through the power of who HE is in us. That year, I started a group that met once a week on Thursday mornings before school for a time of devotion and prayer. Now, I couldn't tell you if I made any sense when I spoke or if I even knew what I was saying, but God used my weakness and turned it into a strength for HIS GLORY.
Fast forward to high school. I was able to do this in a group there as well, which was awesome. I became the person people would come to with questions about the Bible and that was intimidating. I didn't have all the answers and I still don't. But God used me. A small town girl who didn't know what she was doing in this walk of faith (and still doesn't). One of the things in high school and even on into college that took a turn for me was a toxic relationship that lasted for 4 years. I am just going to be real and raw when I say that this relationship took me down a road of sin, shame, and guilt. I dealt with this for 4 years. I had never had a boyfriend before and I was vulnerable. I was just doing whatever I thought I needed to do to keep him in my life.
Now fast forward to my fall semester of college… we broke up. And I was a wreck. I was a wreck emotionally and spiritually. I had sort of drifted away from my relationship with God because I had put my relationship with my boyfriend before Him and I had lost what I thought was so secure. To sum it all up, my long-term boyfriend was out of my life, I was in my second year of college still feeling like I don't belong at WKU, and I had no idea what my major was going to be.
But right around this time, I had just joined my sorority and little did I know what a blessing that was. At the last minute, I decided to go through fall recruitment before starting my second year of college. Ever since this series of events occurred, my faith has grown tremendously.
Life flipped upside down and right side up again because of God's faithfulness.
My life has changed so much in a year and a half because of new relationships and a multitude of opportunities that was presented to me throughout this time. I have been given a solid group of friends to keep me accountable. After five major changes, I have finally decided on a degree that I believe I have been called to, which is Healthcare Administration. The breakup a that semester I thought was the end of my life became one of the best things that has ever happened to me and I am now dating a guy that is amazing beyond belief. I became Chaplin for my sorority where I am still upholding my position and I have found my purpose at WKU.
I see this as a God thing because He literally handed me my mission field. God showed me what I needed to do and where and all I had to do was say YES. Now, I lead a bible study with a fraternity on campus and am able to speak to my sisters about what God has done in my life and what He can do in theirs. Am I afraid to be bold and speak sometimes? Of course. But I am called to proclaim the gospel. The Gospel means "good news" and man, I definitely believe it's good news.
Matthew 28:18-20 says Then Jesus came to them and said, "All authority in heaven and on earth has been given to me. Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you. And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age."
We are called to tell about the story of Jesus and one way of doing that is by just sharing what He's done in your life. Share your story because when you show others your past, your brokenness, your weaknesses, they see how God pulled you out of that and how it is now your job to share with others about how awesome He is and what He has done in your life for HIS GLORY. All you have to do is say "Here am I" just like Isaiah did in Isaiah 6. I pray that whoever reads this is ready to just say yes.
Hebrews 10:35 says "So do not throw away your confidence; it will be richly rewarded. You need to persevere so that when you have done the will of God, you will receive what he has promised."
God will be your confidence because He is in you wherever you go. Persevere through your fear and know that you are doing what you are called to do. When you arrive at heaven's gates you want to know that you'll get a pat on the back and a "job well done" from your Heavenly Father. You have an important role to play in a bigger and even better story that we call God's story. So share your story and God will share His through you. Yes, even you.
