In the weeks leading up to Thanksgiving break, I was super excited and even a bit anxious to return home for the first time (for more than a day) since move-in in August. I was ready to see all of my friends, dance team, and relatives again, and throw my boyfriend into the mix all in five short days. I did not spend the past three months of college dwelling on missing my friends, because even though there were moments when I did, this was the new life I was meant to embark on separate from all of them. It did not take me long to realize that maybe the people and places back home did not change, but I did.
"It's a funny thing coming home. Nothing changes. Everything looks the same, feels the same, even smells the same. You realize what's changed is you." - F. Scott Fitzgerald
I was once told that high school friends are not forever friends. I did not believe that leading up to college move-in all the way to Thanksgiving break, but now I've seen it for myself. Of course this doesn't mean there aren't a select few people I'm still really good friends with because there are. But there are not nearly as many because even if they haven't changed, I have. I've taken these past few months to really grow up and mature, and above all move on from high school and transition into the next stage of my life.
This is a pivotal time in my life. I'm not going to pretend that life is what it was six months ago as soon as I go home because it will never be the same. That is absolutely okay. I was never unrealistic, maybe just slightly naive. But I've seen it with my own eyes now, and accepted it for what it is. I never was stuck in high school, but now know that there is no way I can allow myself to ever be that way. This is exactly why people refuse to attend their high school reunions. Why exactly would you? It's hard to understand why someone wouldn't want to before you stand in their shoes, along with most people who have graduated high school and moved on to bigger and better things. It is time to move on in life and continue to hold on to the memories, but never pretend that things will be the same again. It is time to make new friends, focus on academics and our future careers, fall in love, return to our families during the holidays, and then see our high school friends from time to time. High school isn't forever, and life will never resume to being what it was after you leave home for the first time in your life. Break wasn't what I expected it to be, but instead was a valuable learning moment that has significantly changed my outlook on life.
