One of my favorite quotes goes something like, “A comfort zone is a beautiful place, but nothing ever grows there.” I like it because it confronts a reality that many choose not to face in their day to day lives, which is the fact that a majority of us never stray from the gray area we are born into and grow up in. The quote also makes sure not to diminish the "beauty" of our comfort zones because if they weren’t so beautiful we would not be so tempted to stay there. Comfort zones are easy. They are familiar and friendly. They are comfortable. But if you choose to look at the world from a scope other than your own (which as a collegiate, you should be doing), you will realize that they are in fact very limiting. Comfort zones are narrow and restrictive. They keep you from growing outside the walls that you and others in your early years carefully built. Stretching beyond them requires a thick skin to break through those barriers, and you will be hurt in the process. On the other side, though, is a version of you that you have never met. She or he is stronger, braver, and wiser. They are grown. They have cuts and bruises, but they have learned how to bandage them themselves. They can conquer many a mountain, and fear has much less a place in their vocabulary than it did before. Removing yourself from the familiar is the quickest way to reach that other, stronger, wiser version of yourself. You have no choice but to learn to grow, and though it will not be easy, I promise you it will be worth it.
I actually started my freshman year in college not far from home. It was close enough for me to run away to when times got tough or I wanted an escape, and I used it as needed. But it was just that: an escape. It was a way out, and if we don’t pay attention to ourselves, that way out can turn into a habit of avoiding some of the tougher realities of life. My moving fifteen hours south allowed for absolutely, positively, no escape. There is no way out of dealing with myself and whatever issues or people I must face. I cannot hop in my car and drive two hours to run into the arms of people who will love me unconditionally. I can hop in my car and drive two minutes to CookOut for a milkshake, but I am still alone. Alone, away from the comfort you have always known, will drive you to be the best version of yourself. There is no common ground to return to, nudging you with a “this is how it has always been” or “this is how you have always dealt with it.” You will have the freedom to face your demons, whatever shape they take, and choose to act better.
It is possible that the ways of our comfort zone at home are still what we will find when we get out of them. I, for one, still know that M&M’s have the power to turn my mood around the same way they did when I was five. The purpose of getting away from what you have always known is to grow and try new ways of living. You may travel to Italy and find that you like the way that they don’t eat dinner until 8 p.m. or you may hate it. The point is, you got out of the place you called familiar, tried something new, and adjusted your way of life accordingly. Unfortunately, most life adjustments are not a result of a fabulous vacation to Italy. Often, they are a result of the unpleasant things of life happening to you. When you remove yourself from the familiar and something shitty -- I mean really shitty -- happens to you, you have to adjust your view. All by yourself. You are without choice. All of the comforts you know are many of miles away, and while technology is great, it does not replace hugs or hot meals at the same table you have sat at for over a decade surrounded by people that love you.
Learning to care for yourself in those hard times will result in exponential growth. You will learn your vices and virtues ever so quickly, though they may be painful to face. You will learn how to deal with those bad things better, and though the bad things will never get weaker, you will grow stronger. You emerge from your comfort zone so bandaged and bruised that many from your past will not recognize you, and they will tell you that you have changed like that’s a bad thing. But it’s not. And you’re still you, you’re just a new you, a better you, a stronger you. Going far from home will change you, and at times, the homesickness will seem like it takes up all of the space in your life. But on the other side of fear awaits a side of you that is braver and wiser, knowing that within you has lied the courage to have endured some of the most formative years of life away from all of the things you have known.
