Why 'God' Is An Asshole

Why 'God' Is An Asshole

And why he (probably) isn't real.

I believe in God, the Father almighty,
creator of heaven and earth.

I believe in Jesus Christ, God's only Son, our Lord,
who was conceived by the Holy Spirit,
born of the Virgin Mary,
suffered under Pontius Pilate,
was crucified, died, and was buried;
he descended to the dead.
On the third day he rose again;
he ascended into heaven,
he is seated at the right hand of the Father,
and he will come to judge the living and the dead.

I believe in the Holy Spirit,
the holy catholic Church,
the communion of saints,
the forgiveness of sins,
the resurrection of the body,
and the life everlasting.


"Who can tell us what the Holy Spirit is"?

It all begins with a question, or in this case, a series of unanswered questions. As I sat perplexed in my 3rd-grade religion class, I squirmed in my kilt, passing notes, as well as the time. I was asked what, or who, the Holy Spirit is. My tongue snapped: "Well it is everything": the perfect Catholic school bull shit response, guarantying my A and Good Noodle Star.

But what was it? As I was taught, it really is everything. It is the space in between a boy and a girl when they dance, it is the ABC $10 dollar wine served at mass, it is the spit swapped in the blood of Christ, the jimmy smoked by every priest after mass, it is in every boy, girl, murderer, terrorist, and rapist, and human being. It is God.

But how? How did this happen? How did God become a God then? Who birthed him? How did Mary have a child without sex? How did Jesus die and rise on the third day?

All these answers were spelled out in a holy textbook, but I still got the questions wrong. All the years of Catholic propaganda being shoved down my throat finally made be gag. After my 8 years, I walked out of the warden's office and never returned.

Given everything I was taught that fateful day, God would be this all-powerful being who holds people's hand through life; he is the comforter of aliments and the bringer of light. I ask myself, if this God is real, and has this much power over us weaker specimens, why is there so much pain, genocide, homicide, rape? How could he lead his sheep to slaughter?

Because God is a fucking asshole.

God is the little boy who sets fire to the anthill and laughs. God is one who pisses in our Cheerios. God is the bully who kicks sand in your face on the playground. God is the snake that eats the bird eggs from the nest.

"But God does not do bad things, he represents the good in all man, even the unrighteous"

As we have learned from Mr. Stevenson, like Dr. Jehkyll and Mr. Hyde, one man cannot be solely good or bad; they marry together in harmony. If God isn't man, then "he" shouldn't be referred to as "he". With all good, God could influence the bad. If he guides the hand of his shepherd, he could guide the hand of every hand that rapes every child, every stab that cuts flesh, and needle that punctures the skin. If God and the holy spirit are present in every man, then couldn't they, too, bad?

It isn't holy, it is wicked.

However, I believe none of this.

I do not believe God gave me cancer.

I do not believe God made my dog die.

I don't believe God made terrorists kill people.

And I don't believe God made me do anything.

Do I believe in God? Not really. Nothing is for sure though, like I will never say aliens aren't real, Johnson might not have assassinated Kennedy, Tupac might be living underground with Elvis and Houdini, or that Obama might be a Russian spy sent to shoot lasers into our houses at night (yes I have heard this). I don't know. On the other hand, I refuse to say that "it" controls our fate, our lives, what we do, who we fuck, or why we do the things we do.

The world is a fucked up. During times of hardship, hospice, and hostile heartbreaks, people need something to believe in, whether that is a mythical it in the clouds, or a fairy that lives off the laughter of children, or even bigfoot. Whatever gets you through the day, believe in it; fuck if it's wrong or not, who is to know.

But I don't need that. I believe in myself.

Now and forever,


Cover Image Credit: Pixels

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To The Senior Graduating High School In A Month

"What feels like the end, is often the beginning."

It wasn’t too long ago that I was in your shoes. Just a little over a year ago, I was the senior that had a month left. One month left in the hometown that I grew up in. One month left with the friends that I didn’t want to leave. One month left in the place that I had called “my school” for the past four years. You are probably thinking the same things I thought whenever it came down to only 30 days left. You’re probably scared, nervous, worried, or anxious. Maybe you’re like me and are dying to get out of high school, ready to start a new chapter. Or maybe you aren’t so ready yet. Maybe you’re wishing for a little more time.

As scary as it is, this month you have left will fly by. You’ll blink and you’ll be standing in your cap and gown, waiting for your name to be called to receive your diploma. You’ll look back on your last four years at your school and wonder why time went by so fast. It’ll be bittersweet. However, trust me when I say that you have so much to look forward to. You are about to begin taking the steps to build your future. You are going to grow and learn so much more than any high school class could teach you. You are going to meet amazing people and accomplish amazing things. So, as scared as you might be, I encourage you to take that first step out of your comfort zone and face this world head on. Chase your dreams and work towards your goals. You are smart. You are brave. You are capable of achieving amazing things. All your life, the lessons you have learned have prepared you for this point in your life. You are more than ready.

There are times when you will feel alone, scared, or confused. There are times when it won’t always be easy. But those are the times when you will shine the most because I know you will work through whatever problems you may face. Don’t think of the bad times as a terrible thing. Use them all as learning experiences. As author Joshua Marine once said, “Challenges are what make life interesting and overcoming them is what makes life meaningful.”

You might think that this is the end. However, it’s not. This is only the beginning. Trust me when I say that the adventures and opportunities you are about to face are nothing compared to high school. Whether you are going to college, going to work, or something else, this is the beginning of your journey called life. It will be exciting, it will be terrifying, but it will all be worth it.

So, as you walk out of your high school for the very last time, I encourage you to take a deep breath. Relax. You’ll always have the memories to look back on from high school. But your time is now, it begins today. Embrace it.

Cover Image Credit: http://i.huffpost.com/gen/1152445/images/o-HIGH-SCHOOL-GRADUATION-facebook.jpg

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7 Bible Verses For The Insanely Stressed Out College Student

Bible verses to bring peace of mind as finals rapidly approach.


As finals quickly approach and the academic year begins to wind down, it's easy to find yourself becoming bogged down with stress. Despite your religious background, these verses can provide solace and peace to those most in need of it during this stressful time of year.

1. Matthew 6:34

"Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own."

2. Psalm 34:19

"The righteous person may have many troubles, but the Lord delivers him from all."

3. John 16:33

"I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world."

4. Psalm 42:5a

"Why, my soul, are you downcast? Why so disturbed within me? Put your hope in God."

5. Philippians 4:13

"I can do all things through him who gives me strength."

6. John 14:27

"Peace I leave with you; my peace I give to you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid."

7. Philippians 4:6-7

"Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And in the peace of God, which transcends all understand, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus."

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