A few years ago, when it came time for me to choose where I would go to college, I dared myself to go to school on the other side of the country. Before then I had never lived anywhere but my childhood home and hadn’t been away from my family for more than three weeks at a time. Yet my decision had been made and I couldn't have been more excited.
I’d never been a very adventurous person. I was far more comfortable sticking to routines than the thought of trying something new. I hated doing things or going anywhere on my own and I felt like I always needed one of my friends with me. I thought that, at the very least, it would be something different. However, within two months, I knew that I had made the perfect choice for me.
Knowing that I couldn’t just go home for a weekend, or even Thanksgiving, forced me to invest in my time at school. Like any college freshman, I joined more clubs at the beginning of the year then I ever could have actually attended meetings for. I only knew one person before school started, which didn’t let me be shy or fall back on previous friendships. I forced myself to be as outgoing and friendly as possible. I had never been as tired as I was during those first few weeks of school (until the first round of midterms hit) but by my sophomore year, I had a home away from home and friends that became a second family, rather than just a school.
I have become more independent since going away to school and that’s definitely a factor of just growing up and becoming my own person in general, but I think it has at least some small part to do with the distance. I can’t just hop on a plane when I feel overwhelmed or want someone else to make a decision for me, sure I call home—if I keep the time change in mind—but for the most part I've learned to figure things out on my own or with my friends help.
One of the reasons I decided to go to school in California, so that I wouldn't spend my entire life in one place, and if I end up back in New England, then I will know that that is where I want to be. I wanted to see what it would be like to live in another part of the country and in another climate. I wanted to prevent as many "what ifs" as possible. I wanted to make sure that I won't feel stuck somewhere, and now that I know what comes with moving to a new city, I doubt that I will ever feel that way.
Being away from home for at least four months at a time has given me a new appreciation for the area I call home. The longer I spend away, the more my fondness grows and expands, for my neighborhood, Boston, Massachusetts, New England and eventually the entire East Coast.
A lot of older people from home tell me that I am brave for going away to school and that they wish they did the same. I don't feel like it was brave at all, I just made a decision based on what I wanted and thought would be best for me. I'm not saying anything against going to school close to home. Plenty of people decide to go to college close to home and love it. It turns out to be the best fit for them and that's great. I'm just saying that, what has been best for me is being far away because I was forced to break out of my comfort zone and from that have started to grow into a person that I honestly don't think I would have if I had stayed nearby. I wouldn't have met the people I now call my closest friends, or have had the same amazing experiences that I have.
When people ask my parents where I go to school, they are met with a look of sympathy when they answer, as if my choice to go to school on the other coast was some punishment for them or something. When really it was my mom who told me during my junior year of high school that "college is the only time in your life that you can just live in another place. Go for it." I've held her to that statement ever since,and I am forever thankful that she said it, because that is what gave me the confidence to make the best decision I've made in life so far.
