Why "Getting to Know You" Is So Important
Start writing a post
Entertainment

Why "Getting to Know You" Is So Important

1141
Why "Getting to Know You" Is So Important
Wholesome Lady

Lately I’ve been pondering the “getting to know you phase” of relationships. I don’t mean within friendships or casual flings, but the beginning of something both partners know will be great. Seeing as I’ve also been reading Charles Dickens, I think his character of David Copperfield phrases this period of time in the most eloquent, beautiful way possible. Wrapped up in his newfound love for his future wife, he states, “In our youthful ecstasy, I don’t think that we really looked before us or behind us; or had any aspiration beyond the ignorant present.”

Who hasn’t felt this initial bliss in the beginning of a relationship? In the first shy weeks and months of getting to know someone, I personally have never known such ignorance or felt so carefree. For that short window of time, what is there to worry for? What reason is there not to trust him, or him, me? Although it may be foolish, I love this time. Those little moments build a relationship.

The most important part of Dickens’ quote is that of looking forward or behind oneself. Relationships suffer when a couple begins to dwell or worry, something that I have found is so easy to do in college. Relationships move fast during these years, as do most things in our lives. Yet in these first hangouts, first conversations, first kisses and more, my tendency to worry dissipates as fog does on a warm morning. I become elated as my feelings begin to develop, and there is no future or past besides what I’m feeling at that moment.

Unfortunately, that moment is never meant to last. Life begins to get in the way. Past wounds and insecurities begin to resurface, and I worry for what is to come. I live eight hundred miles away from Florida, which usually means four months apart in the summer. I wonder if, in a school of 50,000 students, there could possibly be someone better for me. The trials and tribulations of my past and those that may come in the future begin to weigh heavy on me. That blissfulness I felt so strongly in the beginning simply fades away. All of that is only on my end and occurs somewhat in unison with the issues my partner may be hiding. Someone usually begins to pull away, and things fall apart. And so it goes. 

This process is sad, but I have accepted that it is a part of life. Ignorance is never meant to last, but the preservation of that bliss is attainable. How? I’m not sure I can say. I firmly believe that when I can finally make that bliss last, I will enjoy a fruitful, happy relationship. For now, I can consume myself in the present, ignorant or not, and do my best to not look forward or behind me. After all, we have no promise of tomorrow, just the moment we are in right now.

It’s true that I’ve never been able to make the getting to know you phase last. The ignorant happiness fades for me sometimes, and sometimes it fades for the person I’m with. Yet with the ups and downs of my relationships, and as each love takes fire and eventually burns out, I am gifted with one thing. Those first euphoric moments are branded into my memory, never to be taken away. I will always remember the time when that person was just a stranger, getting to know the person that I am. I will never forget the beautiful parts I got to see in others before the foolish happiness began to fade. Those memories are more than enough to keep me open to love and optimistic for all the love I have in store.

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
Featured

Haunted Houses For Halloween In New Jersey

The Top Scariest Haunted Houses In New Jersey

655

Residing in New Jersey enables you to participate in various activities, and everyone has a favorite. In New Jersey, Halloween is also celebrated in a spooky way. There are many scariest haunted houses in NJ to celebrate Halloween. If you want to confront your greatest fears, Halloween Scariest haunted houses are ideal.

Keep Reading... Show less
Featured

Leaving My Backpack In The Library

Views about society and the stranger sitting right across from me

41640
https://unsplash.com/photos/O0T1SIgHAfM

As a college student, my backpack is an extension of myself in many ways. It contains my notes, pens, and computer vital for my success in college. It contains the snacks and water bottle I need to survive long days on campus. It also contains the "in-case" items that help put my mind at rest if I forgot something from home: extra hair ties, masks, and that backup-backup snack. With so much in my backpack important to me and my life on campus, it is no wonder that I can get apprehensive about it when it is not with me or in my line of sight. And that makes me wonder.

Keep Reading... Show less
Featured

5 Cool Gadgets To Make Your Car Smart

Don't let this stop you from making your car smart. You can change the one you have using smart gadgets that transform your car into a smart car.

102905

Cars are no longer just a mode of transport, where you only worry about the engine and how beautiful its interior is. These days, everyone wants to make their cars smarter, those with advanced technology systems. It makes sense for several reasons. It can make your vehicle more efficient and safer when you need to drive.

Keep Reading... Show less
Featured

The Inevitable Truth of Loss

You're going to be okay.

125364

As we humans face loss and grief on a daily basis, it's challenging to see the good in all the change. Here's a better perspective on how we can deal with this inevitable feeling and why it could help us grow.

Keep Reading... Show less
Featured

'Venom: Let There Be Carnage' Film Review

Tom Hardy and Woody Harrelson lead a tigher, more fun sequel to 2018's 'Venom'

103483
Photo Credit: Sony Pictures Entertainment – YouTube https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-FmWuCgJmxo

When Sony announced that Venom would be getting a stand-alone movie, outside of the Tom Holland MCU Spider-Man films, and intended to start its own separate shared universe of films, the reactions were generally not that kind. Even if Tom Hardy was going to take on the role, why would you take Venom, so intrinsically connected to Spider-Man's comic book roots, and remove all of that for cheap action spectacle?

Keep Reading... Show less
Facebook Comments