I wish that this was going to be an article where I presented you with the answer, the answer to why people go through life putting on “fronts,” why we pretend to be someone we’re not and why we go through so much effort to hide the person behind the mask. I really wish I knew why it is we can’t judge a book by its cover and what it is that places this fear of being vulnerable inside of us.
When I think of the issue of “putting up a front,” I find myself wondering about happiness. Because people sometime tend to mask their feelings or uphold these fake personas of themselves, how can we know which of these people are truly happy in their lives? It is hard to be happy if you cannot live life as the person you really are. Hiding who you are just becomes an unnecessarily stressful burden.
But what does it really mean to be happy? There are people that show their happiness outwardly, who do not mask their feelings and wear their hearts on their sleeves, and others who feel what I think to be a common sense of needing to keep things to themselves and suppress these feelings. This, however, does not make them any less happy than those who do not feel the need to uphold what society is quick to judge as “a front.”
The problem with putting up a front for others is that eventually it can become a part of you, this fake visage becomes a natural reflex in the battle to hide who you really are from the outside world. Amidst his fantastical stories and seemingly silly quotes, Dr. Seuss really did leave us with valuable advice when he said, “Why fit in when you were born to stand out?”
I am now on a mission to find the answer to his question. Why? Why do we have this natural reflex to fit in, pretend we are like other people, putting up this front that masks who we are. The people we think to be the most miserable may be filled with happiness on the inside and afraid to show the world. The most seemingly confident on the outside might use this false security to hide their overwhelming sense of insecurity and intellects mask their knowledge in this unnecessary effort to fit in.
If anyone has the answer to Dr. Seuss’ question, I would love for you to share. It may be as simple as fearing judgment. But doesn’t it seem easier to face judgment head on and defeat it than to live our lives pretending we are something that we’re not and hiding from ourselves? It seems like it should be simple, but is such a scary thought. I am determined to find out why this is so difficult. It seems such an unnecessary, yet inescapable, evil. If we can just find it in ourselves to stop our attempts to fit in, be vulnerable and comfortable with others, I think we’d relieve a large portion of the stress in our lives.
