Every time I turn my head, there is a poster, billboard, commercial, friend, acquaintance, or celebrity influencing me to look and dress a certain way. Yesterday, I noticed billboards of models who are skinnier than a toothpick. Today, after shopping around for new clothes, I sense the trend is to wear next to nothing. Did companies program the sewing machines to stop sewing halfway down the shirt (because lacy lingerie shirts and crop tops are all stores sell for shirts these days)?
The 21st century has this messed up idea of beauty that I do not agree with. These particular arguments are thrown in my face every day, and I refuse to listen to them.
"Skin is in."
To me, confidence does not come from showing too much skin, so I do not show off my body off like a display in a museum. I do not wear crop tops, bikinis, or anything revealing. This does not mean I think I am ugly or overweight, it means I already know I am beautiful (because God doesn’t make ugly people). Dressing modestly does not come at the expense of looking like a potato either; in fact, it's more revealing than any article of clothing. The pressure society has put on having a "perfect" bodies leaves girls (and guys) mentally obsessed with comparing, and feeling unworthy of love. Who sets the standard for what a perfect body even is?
“Guys will never like you if you don’t show off your ‘features.’”
More than anything, my heart longs to find true love one day. To avoid attracting men who will only use me to fulfill their lust, I want the way I dress, act, and live to attract a man who is impressed by my composure, poise, soul, and strength. Let’s say I do find a man that will love me. I long for him to love me for my heart, my mind, and my soul. Not my body. I never want to be objectified or praised for features such as my bust, butt, or hips when I’d much rather be noticed for my smile and how I stand up for what I believe in.
“Why don’t you post a selfie?"
I do not feel the need to post selfies. Selfies help promote a narcissistic self-love that focuses on physical features. If posted with the wrong mindset, it can turn good intentions into selfish ones. Likewise, why do I need people on social media to see my workout/diet success story through pictures? The reason I work out will be to maintain my health, not seek compliments from others. Guys gawking over me for merely my toned body is the last form of attention I want to have. Not to mention the thought of causing a man to be unfaithful to his future or current girlfriend. I grieve at thinking I am the cause of another girl’s envious sentiment when she should be loving her own body instead.
All in all, why would I want everyone to focus solely on my body when my actions, heart, and personality are far more appealing? My goals in life are far more important than how I look at a party or in a picture. There is enough value in me, internally, through my soul, my heart, and my mind that I never want the way I represent myself externally to be a false representation of that.
Physical beauty changes overnight. Internal beauty remains the forever. I mean, seriously, if beauty alone guaranteed a person instant happiness or a lasting, committed, and trusting relationship, why are the most gorgeous people in all of Hollywood filing for divorce and cheating on their spouses?
God made me a woman for a reason: to use my beauty to shape the way the ones around me act, think, and treat me (as well as others). By dressing inappropriately, how am I influencing men to act, think, and treat me and other women?
Beauty has the power to shape the minds of the ones around you.
