In recent months, I can’t tell you how many times someone has told me in person or posted on social media that they have lost and unfriended so many people as a result of the upcoming Presidential Election. I honestly don’t understand why that is such a common occurrence today. Since when did we stop being able to have difficult discussions without destroying our relationships with others?

Last year during my short lunch breaks, my friend group would often sit around talking about the three things we’re told to never talk about with others if we want to remain friends with them- politics, religion, and money. So many times one person or another would get up and storm away angrily because of something someone else said. So again, I ask, why are we not able to have these difficult conversations?

I have come to the conclusion people are not open to others’ ideas anymore. As soon as someone expresses a different opinion, people tend to mentally block everything else they say out considering it the ramblings of an uncultured, incompetent person. This should not be the case though. We should be able to have conversations where we are open to others’ points of view, and accept that they may or not change our views, or make us see things in a new light.

I am reminded of something my parents have been saying to me since I was fairly young: You need to be able to disagree without being disagreeable. My parents' words have stuck with me in difficult conversations since then. While I definitely do not always agree with my friends' and peers' political or other views, I’m open to hear what they have to say. However, I have found that this attitude toward these difficult conversations is not common nowadays, and it’s very disheartening. I am in no way saying that I’m perfect in this aspect or that I’m always open to everyone’s opinion all of the time. (Because there are definitely days when I’m just not feeling it). But nonetheless, I try to hear people out before I immediately dismiss what they’re saying.

There are some views I hold, such as those regarding my faith, that I know I will not waver on. Even though my faith is my faith and that won’t change, I still enjoy learning about other religions. Similarly, for the most part, I know what I believe politically, but this has been shaped through years of listening to adults having hard political discussions, and listening to rational debates rather than emotional rants.

This idea of rational conversations about these controversial topics is especially important with this year being a presidential election year. Not to mention, with all of the racial tensions, conflicts, and violence that have been rampant lately. And with two candidates who can’t seem to disagree without being disagreeable, what kind of example is being set for the eager first-time voters who are pumped to finally have a say in the political world?

At the end of the day, it is extremely saddening to me that people who are very good friends in all other aspects end their friendships because one is voting for Clinton and the other for Trump. I encourage all people to strive to disagree without being disagreeable, and try to salvage relationships (even if you do stand on the complete opposite spectrum as the other person).