Packing up my suitcase, for what should be the last trip on this old road. Making sure every spark fits in--although impossible might be. For the ones that stay out, the light will fade and the heat will go, the long-lasting impressions of them in my heart will proceed to be the only thing that keeps them alive. Alive in a realm of dreams and emotions I barely dare to step into.
Lost somewhere among my belongings I desperately look for that picture perfect moment--like it could actually still be here--Postcards and pictures keep finding their way to the floor, they pass before my eyes just like those seconds did, those instances, those moments. Bliss, happiness, love, passion, however you want to call it--Real, as far as I'm concerned.
-What's next?
-Right, the route
I flip through the pages of this old map and there isn't a single road I haven't taken--I know realized the sad truth--How I followed all of them in hopes that I would find what I left behind to get on the very first one. It was in a matter of seconds that my heart pulled harder than my mind, the bond was broken and the love was gone. For what had at one point held me together was now pulling me apart, dividing me in two and burying my feet just so that roots would grow.
-Settling down?
-What was that supposed to mean?
Looking down on this trail and then up to the stars, in this full moon night the clouds disperse letting all the shine through, with the tree line below me I see them. Raising above the ground proudly standing along the ridge. Maybe it was immature of me to think that the only roots I needed were the ones that put me atop, the ones that comforted me when things took a turn for the worst and lead me to believe I had always belonged somewhere. How could I set new roots? When mine were already firmly on the ground, holding me afloat while I shot for the peak. They are the reason why the branches, I avoid growing, don't block my view, I've known for a while where my roots are.
I guess it goes to prove how scared I really was.
-How was I supposed to know?
-Who the hell can see forever?
Once upon a time I used to think life would work out, that those things would pan out, that my intentions were the only thing that mattered, so good ones were the only kind I gathered. I thought laughter would get me through the tears and that joy was the only company I needed.
Well now I know, that life will pan out, but it won't be for me, but might be because of me if I mean well. That tears will bring out the brightest of smiles, and that having someone to accompany me will be the greatest of joys.
