Freshman year is a once in a life time experience, mainly because that's the first time you are forced to ask some serious questions, like Who am I? Where do I belong? What is my long term goal? What's my purpose in life?
As if that wasn't stressful enough you're then bombarded with even more questions: who am I living with for the year? Where are my classes? Do I have to buy the newest edition of these books? What clubs should I get involved with? What should I do on the weekends? Can I afford all of this?
My freshman year of college these questions swirled around my head, flooding my thoughts and even my dreams. I tried to find the answers by putting myself out there and attending college events that I would never have thought of going to before. I tried spending time with different groups in an attempt to fit in with the one that I thought I would like the best. In my quest to find who I was I ended up losing myself. After about three months into my first semester in college I wasn't the same person, I was a cookie cutter version of myself that I had bent and morphed into something I thought other people would like. If you had asked me who I was back then I would have said: "I am who you want me to be."
About a month later I finally started to notice that I wasn't me anymore, and I didn't like it. So I revived my quest to find myself, and this time instead of look for affirmation from my peers I looked inwardly at who I wanted to be. I prayed, and asked my Creator for guidance. By the grace of God I got involved with a club on campus that was essential in me discovering who I really was and am. I found that I am a confident person who loves to serve others, and through some trial and error I'm still trying to figure out when I can serve others, and when I need to take a step back and take care of myself.
I'm still discovering who I am, what my purpose is, where I belong, and what the end goal is in my life. I don't anticipate finding a definite answer to these questions any time soon, but in my search I'll often look back on that first semester of college and take notes about how easy it is to lose who you are when you place that value on other's perceptions and try to serve others 100% of the time.
As you embark on new experiences, be it college or a new job or a new city, I encourage you to try and answer these questions. What is life but a chance to experience new things and let them impact who you are. So go and experience new experiences, go try out something you would never had done before. I promise it won't be a wast of your time. Every expereince, good or bad, helps shape who we are and who we will become.
