I've heard the phrase TOO many times, "TOO white for the black kids, and TOO black for the white kids". This is something children who have both a white parent, and a black parent identify with nine times out of ten. You would think in this day and age there would be enough multiracial children and diversity where this is not a problem, but it still is. Growing up with a white mom and a black dad, I didn't experience these problems (of course my parents just accepted me as their daughter) until we got in public.
I remember going to the grocery store multiple times with my mom and the cashier asking if we were purchasing separately; or the most commonly asked question, "Is that your mom?". It made me feel like there was something wrong with the way I looked, like there was something wrong with the color of my skin. At a young age I didn't understand why people would ask, because I knew she was my mom, and it was confusing to me how people didn't see that. Then I started going to school, and I learned; children are accepting, and no one is born prejudice. Prejudice is something that is learned from family and other people growing up. As a child, you just know if another kid wants to play with you, you guys are going to be best friends forever (well maybe just for the day).
So, I started school in a fairly low income community, and there were a lot of minorities, mainly Hispanics. They accepted me, but I still had doubt on who I should hang out with because I looked different from my friends. I moved from place to place, eventually ending up in a school that was predominately white. I made friends, but still doubted myself because I still didn't look like my friends. I ended up graduating from a high school that is 98 percent Mexican, and we all knew we were in similar situations and we did for each other what we could, not as black and white or any other combination, but as friends.
The decision on who to identify with got harder as I grew up, because as you grow up you should begin to find yourself. The problem was there are still questions that were left unanswered. There are scholarships just for one ethnicity, and would it be wrong to apply because that is not who I fully am? Can I go to a HBCU without being judged for looking a little different? When filling out a survey, do I put "other" or the choose the one that I look like on the outside, even though there is so much more to me.
Time went on, and there are still questions and doubts in my mind. But I wouldn't change who I am for the world, and neither should you.
