Day after day, I hear lamentations from my friends about how it’s so hard to find a decent guy out there. You hear all about the f*** boys (excuse my language) but rarely do you hear about guys who are genuinely looking for a serious, respectable relationship. As a female in my twenties, I too wonder how I will ever find someone worth investing time and emotional effort in. You hear adults talk all the time about how things are so different today than when they were young, do they have a point? Generally, people think that all the advancements society has made are good things. Technology has improved, medicine has improved, and there have been many social movements made (whether they are overall good or not is yet to be seen).
In the year 2017, you swipe right to find a date and most interaction is with a screen. Women are encouraged to be sexually expressive and to sow their wild oats just like men. All of these changes seem to have come with consequences, one of which is the endangerment of the nice guy. A guy who isn’t just looking for a good time in the sheets but wants to get to know you by taking you out to dinner and having a real, face to face conversation. Guys no longer have to try and woo a girl, they don’t have to show respect or seem to care to have a chance with a girl. In fact a guy doesn’t even have to approach a girl anymore to get her number or her name, he can just go onto an app and get everything he needs. When a guy meets a girl who he has to try to impress why would he bother when there are ten others willing to move much faster for a lot less effort. So, while we women like to think that we are sexually liberating ourselves and that we want to be at the same level of men, we have actually severely limited ourselves.
We wonder why guys seem to only want to sleep with us, or why if we have slept with multiple partners it’s hard to find a guy to commit to us. For girls who don’t want to jump into bed it’s even harder because why should a guy wait when he can have immediate gratification elsewhere. Sex has become the standard and nice has gone the way of the landline, rare and hard to find. So as women around the globe pat themselves on the back for making such great social advancements while also wondering why guys seem to have become total a**holes, maybe we should be looking at our own actions and taking some of the blame.
