When you want to speak up but you feel like you can’t.

When It's Time to Talk About It

How to know when you need to speak up about your struggles.


I know we've all heard the saying, "it's okay not to be okay." But sometimes it just doesn't feel that easy. There's a fear that comes with bringing it up, whatever it is, in general. We want someone to know because it needs to be talked about, but speaking about it would mean that person is worrying, and that's a whole different issue to deal with.

If you can relate to this at all, I'd like to start by saying this: Stop worrying about other people. This is about you. Everyone else will be okay. Also, you don't have to spill your guts every time. I feel like there is this weird pressure that is attached to opening up. We think that we have to give every little detail about everything. Just say what you're comfortable with sharing. If more comes out, then that's great. If you're still processing your feelings yourself, that's okay.

While I don't think it's healthy to bring our issues to every single person in our lives, there's something to be said about the positive effects of verbal processing with one or two trusted people. There's also a lot at risk when we decide to hold it all in.

The worst is when we lash out at the people we love, especially the ones that we want to tell why we're having a hard time in the first place. I know that I even start to get angry at that person, as if they should somehow already know I'm struggling, also though I haven't said anything to them about it. Now an entirely separate issue has been created.

I usually know it's time to talk to someone about what's on my mind when it won't seem to leave my mind. If a thought starts to become a distraction, it needs to exit my mind and be out in the open. I do this because honestly, I don't trust myself to think soberly on some topics. Unfortunately, my mind has the power to deceive. I am just thankful for wise people that I believe in pulling me back into right thinking.

I can become so fixated on a thought, and convince myself that whatever I'm thinking is right. Then, once the words leave my mouth, I want to grab them from out of the air before they land on my confidante's ears. Fortunately, she has my back at all times and would not judge me for my thoughts. In the end, I'm always happy it's out there so that she can help me redirect my thinking. We need each other for that.

It's said often in the Christian community, "you're not meant to do life alone." I believe this completely. I'm just directly in need of other people. I'm glad other people need me, too. We're in this together, so don't be afraid to share what you're going through. Who knows, you might help someone else out, too.

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If You've Ever Been Called Overly-Emotional Or Too Sensitive, This Is For You

Despite what they have told you, it's a gift.

Emotional: a word used often nowadays to insult someone for their sensitivity towards a multitude of things.

If you cry happy tears, you're emotional. If you express (even if it's in a healthy way) that something is bothering you, you're sensitive. If your hormones are in a funk and you just happen to be sad one day, you're emotional AND sensitive.

Let me tell you something that goes against everything people have probably ever told you. Being emotional and being sensitive are very, very good things. It's a gift. Your ability to empathize, sympathize, and sensitize yourself to your own situation and to others' situations is a true gift that many people don't possess, therefore many people do not understand.

Never let someone's negativity toward this gift of yours get you down. We are all guilty of bashing something that is unfamiliar to us: something that is different. But take pride in knowing God granted this special gift to you because He believes you will use it to make a difference someday, somehow.

This gift of yours was meant to be utilized. It would not be a part of you if you were not meant to use it. Because of this gift, you will change someone's life someday. You might be the only person that takes a little extra time to listen to someone's struggle when the rest of the world turns their backs. In a world where a six-figure income is a significant determinant in the career someone pursues, you might be one of the few who decides to donate your time for no income at all. You might be the first friend someone thinks to call when they get good news, simply because they know you will be happy for them. You might be an incredible mother who takes too much time to nurture and raise beautiful children who will one day change the world.

To feel everything with every single part of your being is a truly wonderful thing. You love harder. You smile bigger. You feel more. What a beautiful thing! Could you imagine being the opposite of these things? Insensitive and emotionless?? Both are unhealthy, both aren't nearly as satisfying, and neither will get you anywhere worth going in life.

Imagine how much richer your life is because you love other's so hard. It might mean more heartache, but the reward is always worth the risk. Imagine how much richer your life is because you are overly appreciative of the beauty a simple sunset brings. Imagine how much richer your life is because you can be moved to tears by the lessons of someone else's story.

Embrace every part of who you are and be just that 100%. There will be people who criticize you for the size of your heart. Feel sorry for them. There are people who are dishonest. There are people who are manipulative. There are people who are downright malicious. And the one thing people say to put you down is "you feel too much." Hmm..

Sounds like more of a compliment to me. Just sayin'.

Cover Image Credit: We Heart It

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Starting T Didn't Go The Way I Planned And I'm So Thankful For That

Nothing ever goes as it should, so why should this?


On April 4, 2019, I officially started the medical part of my transition. I say the medical part of my transition because my transition started long before that day, this was just the medical aspect of things. The day before was my 20th birthday and my mom came to town to surprise me. A few months ago she told me that she had scheduled an appointment with my endocrinologist for June 4, 2019, so that I could talk to them about starting T. Over dinner that night my mom told me that part of my birthday present was that she lied about my appointment, it was actually April 4th and not June 4th.

After I got over the initial shock, tears of joy and excitement, my mom and I had a long serious talk about things to make sure that I was ready to go through with things. The time I had to prepare had been cut down from two months to less than 24 hours. At first, I was panicking because I like to prepare for things but this is something that I have wanted for a long time.

When I went to the doctor's office the next day I was ready, I felt calm and prepared. I knew that my life was about to change in a way that I desperately needed and wanted it to. Even though I was ready for this moment I was still super fucking nervous, I left my letters (the letters a therapist has to write for you in order to start your transition) at home so my mom had to run home and get them while I was filling out my paperwork.

After talking with my doctor and her giving me the okay to start, I found out that it would probably be another two weeks before I actually started T because of the insurance company handles the prescriptions. But the way things were working, I got home, my mom left, and fifteen minutes later I got a text saying my prescription was ready for pickup. Again, my time to prepare went from two weeks to instantly.

When I got picked up the prescription and went to the doctor's office to learn how to do my shots I knew everything was right. This whole process wasn't supposed to start until two months from now, and then when it started I was supposed to have two weeks to prepare because of the insurance company. But, it all started instantly and I'm SO thankful for that. If this process hadn't gone the way it did then I wouldn't have a really cool story to tell, I wouldn't have started T the day after my 20th birthday, and I wouldn't be able to tell the world that my mom really does go above and beyond for me. This wouldn't have been possible without her, she really went above and beyond for this one.

Thank you momma, I love you so much. TGFE.

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