"'Tis the season to be jolly."

It's a common enough phrase at this time of year. Thanksgiving has just passed us, decorating is in full swing and Christmas is upon us. Then we'll round it all off by counting down to 2017.

I absolutely loved the holiday season. I loved gathering with my family as we sit down to a Thanksgiving meal, and I loved opening a present on Christmas Eve from my relatives and then waking the next day to open all of them. New Years was never a big holiday for us, but I still loved being in the room with my family and counting it down.

You'll notice that I said that paragraph in the past tense, and that's because my holidays have changed. After my grandfather died and my parents divorced, the holidays became less together. Thanksgiving became a less big affair, and my Aunt and Uncle stopped coming for Christmas. My brothers started to go out on New Years. My holidays contained less and less family.

This used to make me very sad and I still do miss that large Christmas gathering, a ton of food and my cousins all around. Lately, though, I've developed my own traditions. I come to my fiance's for Thanksgiving, since my family is so spread out for this holiday. We play Thanksgiving bingo, and I help prepare a dish (this year Luke and I made some pretty fabulous mashed potatoes). Then, for the Christmas season, I spend Christmas Eve with my family. My mom, my brothers, and their families gather around and we exchange presents. It's easier that way because then my brother can go to his in-laws on Christmas Day. For myself, I leave early on Christmas morning to come to Luke's house and we do presents and then go to his Uncle's house and exchange more. Typically, since we're on break from college at this time, I'll stay through to New Years and ring it in with Luke, but this year will be a little different. This year I'll be coming back and I'm not totally sure where I'll be spending my New Year.

Why am I telling you every little detail of my holiday plans? Well, I suppose I'm just trying to say that change is okay. Holidays aren't about places or the amount of food you can get. They're not about the people you've lost or even the people who couldn't make it. Holidays are about who you get to be with and what you get to have. I've spent too much holiday time thinking about what I'm missing or what I want it to be like, and not enough on appreciating what I have and what it is like.

I love the traditions that I have now, but even they are going to change. Luke and I are going to get married and I don't know where I'll be living. Maybe we will see my family a lot more over the holidays or maybe we'll be far away from both. Either way, I know that the holidays are what I choose to make of them.

So no matter where I go or who I'm with, I'm going to be thankful for what I have, celebrate the birth of my savior, and look forward to the new year I've been given.

I hope that you will, too. If you find yourself feeling down because someone is missing from around your table, that you'll remember happily the good times of them beside you. Or perhaps you'll take the steps to bridge that gap and welcome them back to your table, if possible. The holidays aren't about what you're missing, but celebrating what you have. It's okay to miss people, and to miss the way that things have been. Yet, you shouldn't get so lost in it, that you don't see what you have.

New traditions won't ever be the same as the old traditions, but they can be just as fun if you'll give them a fair try.