Growing up, you met tons of people, some of which you will get along with better than others. Some people are meant to stay in your life, but others are there just to serve as a lesson. Everything happens for a reason. But why is it that it seems like the people you used to be friends with always seem to befriend each other? You know, the girl you got in a fight with or your best friend of 10 years that you just don't get along with anymore? Suddenly they're super close, commenting on each other's pictures and hanging out. But just a few weeks ago they hated each other. Your friend was on your side, but now she's best friends with the enemy. Why is that?
When someone gets into a fight with another person they are going to turn to whoever they can to get validation. They want people to side with them and to tell them that they are right, even when they are not. Turning to someone they know already had an issue with you is the simple answer. They can get that sense of support they're desiring. At first, this can be really frustrating and often times even hurtful, but there are a few things you should realize.
First of all, these kinds of friendships never last. They will eventually see within each other what you tried to point out before. They will crash and burn and you'll be left thinking "I told you so". Unfortunately, however, these people are too blinded by their need to be reaffirmed that they will completely overlook everything they know about that person. People really feel power in numbers and feel like they are right just because there are more people on their side.
Second of all, they may be doing this to get a reaction of you. They may know that their becoming friends with your ex-friend will hurt you, and in their moment of unclear thinking and rage, this is their goal. This only works, however, if you let it. Words cannot hurt you unless you consciously make the decision to let them. If you choose to pay it no mind, it will take up no room in your mind. Realize that by being upset you're giving in and letting them win. Hold your head high and realize that they will soon find out why this was a huge mistake, all on their own.
Thirdly, these type of people aren't worth your time anyway. Anyone that deliberately hurts someone they used to be close with is not worthy of you. Be thankful you found out now the type of person they are, and pray they choose to keep your secrets confidential. I believe when you become close to someone, regardless of what happens to you two in the long run, you need to respect them and what they tell you during your friendship, but not everyone feels this way. Once again, however, it is best to find out they are this type of person sooner rather than later.
It is going to suck at first. You are going to feel like you have no one. But take this opportunity to take a step by and appreciate the people who have stuck by you. Never take loyalty for granted again and thank your close friends for never leaving your side. This is going to pass with time and you need to trust it. The less you give in to the social media posts, comments in the hall, etc. they are going to pull, the quicker it will pass. Just remember these sick people are doing this to get a reaction out of you to "hurt" you, but they can only do so if you let them.
