Listen, it is absolutely, one hundred percent okay to want to be quiet or be alone for a minute, an hour, or a day. In today’s society I think we all feel very pressured to always be entertaining to those around us. We are a very entertainment driven society, expecting everything we come in contact with to add entertainment to our day. This is not the case though! You do not always have to be “on”.
Now, I’m not suggesting you become a lonely hermit and start living in a cupboard (but, if that is what you want then by all means have at it). I know that with my friends there is always someone in the group saying something or doing something that draws the attention of the rest. Then that attention popcorns to the next person then the next and so on and so forth. I understand that a lot of the time you feel pressured to say something, to add to the conversation, to take on the attention. I also understand that sometimes when you try doing this (saying something to add to the conversation) you end up creating the most awkward of awkward silences. Consequently, you smile and mentally climb under a rock for the rest of eternity.
Here’s the thing though: there are no written laws that say when the group is talking you must say something or so help you the sky will crack open and rain fire. If you don’t have much to say to in that particular convo or if you just aren’t feeling up to it that day you can just ‘suck’ for a little while (I know . . . ahh bad word, elementary and high school teachers beware). I’m not saying that people will think you are awful or anything. Just that for some reason we’ve decided being quiet isn’t the normal and ‘sucks’.
It is okay though. To just take a moment and gather your thoughts before you utter something that causes the mental rock dwelling. You are allowed to take some time to ‘suck’, to sit back quietly and just enjoy the moment. Listen to what everyone is saying, laugh if it is funny. Enjoy that they are doing good at the whole talking thing. But just because they are doesn’t automatically mean you have to as well. Maybe later in the conversation you will think up something really good that fits into the moment.
If you are just feeling super out of place that day, you have the right to entertain no one and go spend some time alone instead. Get some work done, enjoy the weather, listen to music and think deeply, etcetera. You can take some time to just ‘suck’. You can reconnect with your friends at a later time. Then you can bravely announce that you wanted to ‘suck’ for just a moment (this method is NOT advised and will spark some questions if put into practice) or you can just walk up and rejoin the group, they are your friends after all.
The point? You have no obligation to always be entertaining. Especially because if you try it could end up awkward for everyone. There’s nothing wrong with you if you just have nothing to say sometimes. Take some time to just be quiet and enjoy the presence of friends rather than force your brain into some kind of entertainment boot camp. If you are feeling sub-par that day then go spend some quality time with you, yourself, and yo (I = yo, it works). Don’t worry about it, your friends will gladly welcome you back into the conversation when you’re ready. Until then, go out and feel free to ‘suck’!
P.S. I’d like to apologize for the amount of times I used ‘suck’ in this article. You either laughed with me or felt pain in your heart every time you read it. I can only hope for the former but as for the ladder, I am sorry I put you through that. Feel free to read back through and replace them all with a better word (I’d suggest ‘vacuum’, because they literally suck).
