When you give a girl a little sib with special needs, she’ll love them immediately. Even before they’re born, she’ll start giving input, like names. If your one-and-a-half-year-old starts saying they want a sibling with a certain name other than the ones you picked out, that must mean that the kid was meant to have that name. Remember that after when you’re filling out the birth certificate.
Because she will love them immediately, she’ll never want to leave their side. She’ll want to be with them 24/7 and will always stand by their crib. She’ll give them their pacifier when they cry, make faces and smile at them, and hold them and never want to let go.
When you give a girl a little sib with special needs, she may not completely understand for a while. There will be something different about her sib but she won’t really notice or care. She’ll even try to participate in the physical therapy exercises and games and wonder why she’s not supposed to be doing them too because they're so much fun.
You’ll give her books like “Views from Our Shoes” and she’ll love them. She’ll feel like there are other people out there who understand. She’ll go to events for kids with siblings with special needs and she’ll come home having met a whole group of new friends who "just get it."
When you give a girl a little sib with special needs, she’ll be their lifelong cheerleader. She’ll be at every sports event, concert, and ceremony she can. She’ll be so proud of their accomplishments she’ll want to tell everyone. She’ll never stop bragging about how amazing her little sibling is.
Because she’s their lifelong cheerleader, she’s also going to be their lifelong protector. Even though she’s usually very kind and sweet, she’ll want to go after the kid who excluded them from playing hide-and-seek. She’ll feel like screaming at the people who stare at them or who ask what’s “wrong" with them. She'll be incredibly angry with people who hurt them. She’ll never understand why people would treat them differently, because who couldn’t love someone with such a huge heart and infectious laugh?
When you give a girl a little sib with special needs, she’ll want to learn more. As she grows up she’ll ask a million questions about why and how. She’ll consider neuroscience and physical therapy and special education because she wants to help people like her sibling. She’ll give presentations on topics like IEPs because she knows how important it is to raise awareness and increase understanding.
When you give a girl a little sib with special needs, she’ll become very independent. She’ll understand that there’s lots of doctor’s appointments and meetings at school. She’ll do her best to figure out her homework herself because their time working with mom and dad on reading and math is more important. She’ll start working to pay for school trips and other things she needs or wants all by herself because she knows that medicine and therapy and equipment and specialists are expensive. She’ll be a pro at keeping herself together because there are often more important things to be discussed or worried about.
She’ll be empathetic and understanding. She’ll know that life doesn’t always go according to plan. She’ll know that people don’t like when you’re chronically tardy but sometimes you can’t help it because a lot of times decisions are tough and can shut them down. She’ll learn that temper tantrums and outbursts are just part of life and that sometimes you can’t do anything except give tissues and hugs and speak in a soothing voice and always, always, always listen.
Even though she’ll be independent and empathetic and understanding, she’ll have her moments. She’ll be jealous and want attention from mom and dad. She’ll be frustrated that things she wants to do or have just aren’t in the budget. She’ll lose her patience. She’ll wonder why.
If you give a girl a little sib with special needs, her life will change for the better. She’ll learn to be caring and treat everyone with kindness and respect. She’ll be slow to judge because you can never know what people are going through just by looking at them. She’ll stand up for those who don’t have a voice. She’ll stand with those who are struggling because she’s a firsthand witness to small, daily struggles. She’ll always celebrate life's little victories. She’ll wonder how life could be any different. She’ll be so glad that she was given the incredible gift of her little sib.
And chances are, if you give a girl a little sib with special needs, she’ll know that no matter how far she goes, she will always have a best friend waiting to welcome her back home.
