When Best Friends Stay In The Past

When Best Friends Stay In The Past

Friendships can either save you or hurt you.


It started in fifth or perhaps sixth grade when I already lost my first best friend, who was also my next door neighbor. I honestly can't tell you exactly how it happened or why we even stopped being friends. I remember we would get in arguments on AIM and email about petty things and eventually we just met different people and moved on from each other. I wish I knew why or how we ended because I still wish we were friends.

Then, in the beginning of 7th grade, I got bullied by the people I thought were not only my friends but my best friends. I met them in 6th grade and we were inseparable. I did everything with 'these' friends. One day I was on MySpace and I saw my best friend was talking crap about me to the guy I had a crush on. Of course, I confronted her. What she did next I'll never forget. From that point on, she rallied all of our friends together and started to bully me. They were cropping me out of pictures, harassing me on myspace, being rude to me at school, the list goes on. And it hurt and of course I had to see them every day because they were in my core class.

I had to hide how I felt every day at school and it sucked. I had to remake new friends because all the people I thought were my friends dumped me. I guess they weren't true friends. I don't want to mention names because it's ancient history now, but from that point on I became different. From just those experiences I built a wall whenever I met new friends.

When I think back from 7th to 11th grade, I had different, new friends every year. Some stayed in my life throughout the years and others left as quickly as they came. I've lost a lot of friends, but want to point out the main ones that I think are important and made me who I am now.

Starting from 11th grade to 12th grade, I began to make a circle of friends who I trusted. There were two main people, and we hung out so much that we became known as "the three amigos." We hung out almost every day, whether it be after school or on the weekends. We would workout with each other, go to parties, go on drives, eat together, have sleepovers, talk about boys, I mean everything you would talk to your best friend about, and that's what they were my best friends.

And then one day all of a sudden I woke up and they weren't there anymore. We all went off to college and of course, we still talked freshmen year and saw each other on our breaks, but then eventually everyone started doing their own thing. I was so up my boyfriend's ass at the time and whenever my two friends asked to hang out I always declined because of him. Eventually, one of them had enough and she drifted away from me, which really hurt. I understood why because I stopped hanging out with her because I was in an emotionally abusive relationship. I couldn't hang out with my friends and she didn't understand that at the time and I couldn't either. I thought what I was doing was normal, but I learned otherwise over time. And the other friend, she was having a blast at college and drifted away from the both of us.

I think I'm the only one now that tried to keep in touch. It hurts because I was so close to them and I have a hard time understanding how they could just leave me that fast. I still try to reach out, but a part of me feels like they don't want to be friends with me anymore. They don't reach out or contact me at all.

So that's why I'm done trying to be friends with anyone. From my own experiences, I've learned the hard way. I don't feel like I can trust anyone because they leave so fast. I just don't want to become vulnerable again and then they leave. It just hurts so much. So I tend to push myself away from people that I feel could become my friend.

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.

Everyone remembers the first time they went to one of the Disney parks. Spinning in teacups and having Goofy wrap his arms around my 8-year-old self were some of my fondest childhood memories, and I'm surely not alone in that.

Keep Reading... Show less

These Superfood Beauty Products Show Kale And Matcha Work For SO Much More Than We Thought

Just another summer's day with a cold glass of kombucha on my face.

I've been vegan for about six years now, so a love for fresh vegetables and superfoods has now become a core part of my being. Don't get me wrong. I love my indulgent, creamy pastas and truffle fries more than anyone. But I keep most of my focus on eating clean and healthy so I can indulge guilt-free.

But I'd say about a large part of my diet has always, unknowingly, included superfoods. Being Indian, lentils, beetroot, garlic, ginger, and whole grains have been core essentials on the family dinner table since I could digest solid foods.

Keep Reading... Show less

Now that college is around the corner for most if not all young adults, students once shook by a pandemic now have to shift their focus on achieving their career goals. As if we thought we had it together already! As an NYC girl, I have always seen myself as a hustler, hungry to advance my career in journalism by having one skill: working hard.

Keep Reading... Show less

5 BBQ Essentials Every Vegan Should Bring To Avoid Summer Cookout FOMO

You'll have your whole family drooling when you bring these goodies over too.

All vegetarians and vegans can relate when I say this: summer barbecues aren't fun when there's nothing you can eat.

Keep Reading... Show less

Kourtney Kardashian has decided to leave "Keeping Up With The Kardashians" after nearly 14 years and although we saw this coming, it breaks our heart that she won't be there to make us laugh with her infamous attitude and hilarious one-liners.

Kourtney is leaving the show because it was taking up too much of her life and it was a "toxic environment" for her.

Keep Reading... Show less
Health and Wellness

We Asked You How You Felt About Resuming 'Normal' Activities, And Some Of Your Answers Shocked Us

The New York Times asked 511 epidemiologists when they'd feel comfortable doing "normal" activities again, considering COVID-19. We asked our peers the same thing, for science.

Last month, the New York Times surveyed about 500 epidemiologists asking about their comfort level with certain activities once deemed normal — socializing with friends, going to the doctor, bringing in the mail. That's all well and good for the experts, but they are a very niche group, not the majority of the population. What do "normal" people feel safe doing? In certain states, we've seen how comfortable everyone is with everything (looking at you, Florida), but we wanted to know where Odyssey's readers fell on the comfort scale. Are they sticking with the epidemiologists who won't be attending a wedding for another year, or are they storming the sunny beaches as soon as possible?

Keep Reading... Show less
Facebook Comments