The “indie” is a semi-recent social phenomenon that’s spread through Westmont’s campus like the drought and may soon affect your campus. In order to prepare for this radical social reform, it’s important to be one step ahead of the game and learn how to carry out the indie with care and precision. But before we get ahead of ourselves, let’s discuss what an indie is.
An indie is an intentional bonding event between two people in order to get to know one another on a deeper platonic level.
If you’re still thinking about that obscure European band you found on the Internet, just know that in the case of pop culture, the word “indie” refers to entertainment that is produced “independently.” However, the kind of indie we’re talking about draws its roots from the word “individual.”
Still confused?
Here’s an example of how to the indie can be used in a real-life social setting:
Marty and Lizzie have spoken in class several times yet want to become friendlier outside of class. To do so, Marty asks Lizzie to go on an indie with him as to obtain a deeper relationship by speaking about subjects they might not usually talk about in a classroom setting, such as the towns they grew up in and why the term “millennials” makes them mutually uncomfortable.
As you can see, when used effectively the indie can bridge the gap between acquaintance and friend. But, although this is the most appropriate and politically correct use of an indie, some Westmont students are popularizing the use of the indie as a romantic date in disguise. Here’s how:
Delilah and James have the same group of friends but don’t speak to one another individually even though Delilah has had a crush on James and notices their many shared interests. But instead of relaying her true intentions to James and asking him on a date, Delilah instead asks James to go on an indie with her.
This is not necessarily a “wrong” use of an indie since it ultimately achieves the goal of knowing another person more intimately, but it's best just to be honest with your indie partner and yourself.
Now, before you start the radical reform of performing indies in your area, here’s some basic guidelines and tips to get you going.
1. Only invite ONE person to your indie.
Any more than that and you’ve officially moved on to the less intimate, yet still effective, “hang out.”
2. Be careful what you share.
While trying to form intimacy with another person, it’s perfectly fine to disclose some details that you might not mention while standing in a cafeteria line. Just make sure that you’re not sharing anything potentially harmful, like your online passwords (no matter how comical they may be).
3. Don’t meet up in a super private setting.
This is a no-no for two reasons. First, silence between acquaintances can easily be made more bearable with the background noise of other people. Imagine the difference between being in complete silence with someone versus hearing the soothing sounds of a blender or gossiping grandmothers acting as a blanket to cover your lack of social grace. Second, and most important, meeting privately makes you physically vulnerable which can be dangerous with people that you’re not well acquainted with.
4. Meet where you can talk comfortably.
Just about every issue of Seventeen magazine, also known as the pre-teen Bible, includes a column with first date ideas, most including destinations great for talking. As important as conversation is for first dates, it’s equally important for indies.
5. Don’t be afraid to go on an indie with someone you’ve never really talked to.
If someone seems interesting to you, even if you’ve never talked to them, there’s no harm in making an introduction and possibly asking them to go on an indie with you. Meeting individually is a great way to get to know someone; but for safety and comfort reasons, remember to refer to guideline #3.
6. Don’t expect to become best friends with someone right away.
Or maybe at all. Indies are used as a time to get to know another person on a deeper level, which is always valuable, but finding a real connection with someone is rare, and long lasting friendships will take longer than one meeting.
7. Be yourself.
As cheesy and overstated as the phrase may be, being yourself in an intimate setting makes those you're speaking with more comfortable and willing to share personal experiences.
Keep these guidelines in mind and you're on your way to glory!
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